It's Never Simple
by Lailuh
Summary: When a simple stealth mission gets interrupted by an unseen factor, the team must figure out out how to deal with a rather odd character while trying to get more information on the Super Soldier serum. Will the information he has prove useful or will the team be pulling out their hair at his antics?
1. Chapter 1

**Hellooo. Second attempt at an Avengers story.**

 **Here's the rundown of everything. This story is following no specific MCU timeline; it's really up to you to decide. Tony and Steve are cool with each other for the most part. It will have references to most of the character movies- ie Ironman, Captain America, Spiderman- in no particular order. It will have no determinable spoilers to Infinity War, a reference or line from the movie here or there but you shouldn't know it unless you've seen the movie. BUT for the most part it's just gonna be a silly story with silly things.**

 **I dunno I just want a story where everyone's together and happy for once in their lives.**

 **Hope you enjoy!**

It was supposed to be a relatively simple mission, which was the only reason Peter had been allowed to join them. It didn't annoy him as much as it first did; having to get approval to join the others on missions. After a relatively _bad_ fight that almost left him blind though, he finally agreed with the others, mainly Tony, that he should probably do more less dangerous missions before going straight to the top. That's why he was going along on the intel run. Get in, get the data, get out. Simple. There were guards around that needed to be dealt with, of course. It was a simple task but not that simple.

Peter had cleared his floor of guards and begun looking through the now empty rooms for any sort of computer he could plug into. The team had been instructed to retrieve a copy of any files they found then destroy the system which, again, was supposed to be easy but the compound had at least a dozen floors with dozens of rooms on them with only _one_ computer that was seemingly moved every single day with no pattern. The team had seen fit to split up and have one person search each floor until they found what they needed, but so far it was looking bleak. Peter was on the eighth floor and they still hadn't found anything but they hadn't managed to set off any alarms either.

" _How's everyone doing so far? Anything?"_ Captain America's voice sounded through his comm.

" _Bottom three floors are clear."_ Natasha's voice answered. She must have met up with Wanda and Clint.

" _Ten and eleven turned up empty."_ Tony answered.

" _Four didn't have anything."_ Barnes answered with a huff.

" _I didn't get anything on ten either."_ Steve sighed. _"How we doing on security Bruce?"_

" _You guys are still in the timeframe._ " Bruce answered from his seat on the Quinjet that was a few miles away. _"They're going to change the guard in about forty-five minutes. I can't believe this place. You guys have done a good job of not alerting anything."_

" _How about you Spider-Man? Any luck?"_

Peter sighed as he closed another empty room. "Nothing so far Cap. Has anyone thought to check the basement? I mean if I wanted to hide a computer with top secret plans on it I'd definitely put it in the basement. But then again I'd probably think that's the first place someone would go to check on it if someone was doing something like we were right now so maybe it's on like the top floor. Or maybe it _is_ in the basement because it's the most obviously place to put it and since it gets over looked-"

" _This place doesn't have a basement Peter."_ Bruce said.

"Really? What kind of evil organization place doesn't even have a basement?"

" _This one kid."_ Tony answered. _"Now keep looking and keep your mouth shut."_

"I'm just saying Mr. Stark," he stated as he opened another room. "All the other places we've been to have had basements so I was-"

" _What's the matter son?"_ Steve asked at his sudden silence.

"Found it." He almost jumped for joy at the sight of the computer in front of him. "Level eight, room five."

" _Good job kid."_

" _Okay. Nat, you, Clint, Buck, and Wanda head out through the main entrance. We'll go out the top as soon as we're done. Peter, get started on extracting the data. We'll be there as soon as we can."_

"You don't have to tell me twice." Peter silently closed the door and sat at the desk. The computer was relatively old: bulky tower and tiny monitor that looked like it was still running Windows Vista. At least the tower had a USB port instead of a floppy drive. It took seconds for him to get in and find the files, the thing didn't even have a password for God's sake.

" _How long until file extraction?"_ Steve asked.

"Not sure." He answered. "This thing is cryptic. It's like it's on dialup. They're still using Internet Explorer and have Bing as their search engine. _Bing!_ "

" _Focus Underoos._ " Tony called.

"Four minutes for extraction."

" _You're still good on time."_ Bruce chimed in. _"Thirty-nine minutes until they change._ "

"Piece of cake." Peter said as he crossed his legs over the table and waited for the files. It was then that his spidey sense went off and instantly regretted the words coming out of his mouth. "Mr. Stark, Cap, what-uh- what are your positions right now?"

" _We're almost to you're location. What's wrong?"_

Peter didn't answer.

" _What's wrong kid? I don't like it when you give us the silent treatment."_ He still didn't answer. _"You got eyes on, Brucey. Give us some info here."_

Bruce turned to the inferred monitor in front of him. _"Looks like there's someone just outside the room he's in. I don't know where it came from but it definitely wasn't there two minutes ago and there weren't any alarms alerted either."_

" _Hold tight son. We're almost there."_ Steve's voice echoed.

Peter had been completely still in the room when Steve informed him they weren't close to him. Someone was standing outside of the door, almost waiting for Peter to pop out of it. He looked at the screen to see the bar at 78% and wished the older generation wasn't scared of upgrading. It seemed like an eternity that the person was outside until he heard footsteps leading away from the room. It didn't make him feel any better about the whole thing though, nor did his feeling go away.

He let out a breath and glances at the screen to see it was at 93%. "It's almost done."

" _You good kid?"_ Tony's voice sounded.

Before he could answer he heard footsteps again, except this time they were running. Next thing he knew the door was flying at his face, knocking him from his position.

" _What was that?"_

" _You know we don't like hearing crashing noises on stealth missions."_

Peter grunted as he pushed the door off himself and looked towards the doorway. He expected to see someone in military gear with a gun pointed at him but instead he was faced by someone in a red and black outside holding a katana.

"Whoa, that never gets old." The stranger said with a laugh. "Okay old man, I'm here to-" He clearly wasn't expecting to see Peter in front of him. "Uuh, oh no. This isn't how it was supposed to go at all. Do you work here?"

Peter was at a loss for words. His mouth was open slightly under his mask trying to make any sense of what happened.

" _Come on Underoos give us something."_

"This is really awkward." He stranger said. "I didn't expect you of all people to be here." He looked at the computer and saw the screen saying the download was complete. "But you seemed to make my job easier." He went to grab the USB but was unable to when Peter got a web on it and got it first.

"Who are you?" Peter asked as he stood up.

"I feel like this is a dream come true." He said, not hiding the giddiness in his voice. "My name's Wade and though you might not know me, I know you quite well. Wait no, I mean, fear me, I'm Deadpool and I'm here to steal your heart- I mean that information. Ah shit."

"What?" Peter scrunched his face in confusion.

"Whatever, let's just get to the fun part." He pulled something out of his pocket and pressed a button, making Peter's senses go haywire. It was two seconds after that the whole building rocked and an explosion was heard and alarms begin going off.

"What the hell?!" Peter exclaimed. "Why would you do that?"

Deadpool shrugged. "Makes things more exciting."

" _What's going on up there kid? We need some sort of explanation for this. This was supposed to be a_ stealth _mission."_ Tony bit out.

"It's not my fault. Some random- _guy_ in a weird outfit just exploded something." Peter basically yelled back.

"Hey! You're _not_ allowed to say my outfit is weird when you're wearing _that_." Wade exclaimed.

" _Then it's out time to leave."_ Steve shouted. _"We got company. Nat, you guys make it out?"_

" _We're almost at the jet."_ She answered.

" _We're still on route to you Spider-Man. Can you get yourself out?"_

"Yeah, no problem." Again, he regretted the words that came from his mouth when shouts were heard from the hall and bullets started spraying into the room. "I mean, there's suddenly a lot of big guys with big guns..."

"Whoa man, this is gonna be a wild ride." Wade put his katana away and took out his gun and started shooting. "Hey Spidey, wanna do something fun?"

Peter didn't have time to answer. Wade ran out of the room and quickly back in, tackling Peter as he went and they both went flying out of the window.

"Are you insane?!" Peter yelled. "We're eight stories up!"

"Yeah but you're Spider-Man." He replies in a calm manner. "There's no way you'd let us die like this, but if we have to die then I'd prefer it was in each other's embrace."

Peter shook his head at the weird remark and shot web to a nearby tree, hoping it was high enough that the two of them wouldn't splat on the ground below. Luckily it was just high enough from them that they went tumbling when they reached the ground instead of completely falling face first.

" _Peter."_ Bruce called. _"Your reading indicate a drop in blood pressure. Were you hit?"_

Peter took a second to catch his breath and sprung up. "No Dr. Banner. I think I'm-" an unexpected surge of pain went up his left leg as he attempted to stand. He looked down to see blood starting to pool on his outer thigh. "Y-you know, on second though, it looks like I might have been shot."

" _Hand on son. We'll be there in one minute."_ Steve's voice rang through.

"No rush Cap. It doesn't look that bad."

"O-M-G is that blood?" Peter turned to see Deadpool walking towards him. "I totally didn't mean for this to happen. I swear."

"D-don't come any closer." Peter bit out through the pain. He fired his web shooters at his feet but nothing came out.

"Looks like you're firing blanks, you could say the same for me if you want. What with the radiation and everything. I mean come on, you couldn't let me keep that? What if I want kids huh?" Deadpool complained.

"Okay for one thing, ew." Peter shook his head trying to unhear what was just said. "And two stay were you are!"

Of course, that didn't deter him one bit. He was standing in front of Peter and shove him to the ground then climbed on top of him. "What are you gonna do?"

"Get off me!"

"Only if you give me a kiss."

Peter laid there, dumbfounded. "Hell no!"

"Just one little smooch and I'll be out of your hair." He leaned in. "I'm sure all the fans will enjoy it very much."

"Mr. Stark! Cap! I changed my mind. Rush would be very nice right about now!" He shouted in his comm while trying to push the man off him.

"We gotcha kid." Peter turned his head just in time to see the Ironman armor flying towards him at what seemed like top speed. His sudden admirer was thrown off him and into a tree.

"You alright son?" Steve asked as he ran up to him while Tony landed between the two of them and Deadpool.

He gave a half hardy laugh. "N-never better."

Steve's lips twitched up for a second before he looked at his wound. "It doesn't look as bad as it could. Karen give me stats."

" _Yes sir."_ Karen'svoice rose to life. _"Mr. Parker has bruises forming along his back and torso from the fall. The bullet he was shot with went straight through without hitting any bone or muscle and will leave no permanent damage to the tissues due to his healing factor. Though I do suggest you stop the bleeding as soon as you can seeing that he has lost 17.4% of total blood in his body. It is not too bad but Mr. Parker will definitely have a headache later. Otherwise there is no other damage to his person."_

"Thank you Karen." Steve said as he helped the boy stand. "Let's get you back to the Bruce. You good to follow, Tony?"

"Yeah, yeah. Give the kid some orange slices or something." Tony answered, not taking his eyes from the man in front of him.

"Dude, _so_ not cool." Deadpool said as he got up. "You could've been nice and asked politely but _nooo_."

"Tell me who you are and what you're doing here and maybe I won't completely disintegrate you right here." Tony pointed his guns at him.

"Hey, hey, we're on the same team." He held his hands up. "My name's Deadpool, but if you don't wanna call me that I guess you can call me Wade and I was only here because I needed-" He took something out from behind his back and throw it at Tony, to which, it exploded in his face with a blast of smoke and glitter. By the time the smoke cleared, he was gone.

Tony merely sighed. "Start the engines Bruce. Let's get home."

 **Welllllll, what did you expect?**

 **I've been in a great need for a story like this for so so long and I hope that _I_ can do it justice. Plus PDiddy being here makes it a lot easier to make the timeline make no sense and complete sense at the same time.**

 **Please forgive any grammatical or spelling errors I might have missed, or feel free to point them out to me so I may fix them. Remember to keep the writer alive by leaving a review!**

 **Hope you enjoyed! See ya later!**


	2. Chapter 2

The flight back to the compound was smooth. Bruce had been able to momentarily stop Peter's bleeding leg until they arrived and Peter had opted for a nap on the floor until they got back. When they did arrive, Clint helped Peter to medbay with Bruce while the others headed towards the lab to look over the files they managed to get. Peter was informed later that they had been about a group of so called scientists that had been _recruiting_ people to turn them into super soldiers, or at least that was how he understood it. They didn't use serums like he would've expected but instead a line up of what sounded like different methods of torture. Exposing people to radiation, pumping them with all sorts of steroids, and different mixtures of chemicals, hell even amputating limbs and seeing others on and trying to make them compatible with each other through stem cells. He felt sick thinking about it.

"Okay, you're fine for now as long as you stay off your leg." Bruce said. "Even with your healing factor it'll take a few days to heal enough for me to take the stitches out. Take it easy for a while and get lots of rest. You're also probably gonna be a little dizzy until you replenish the blood you've lost."

"Good thing I practically fly when I'm being Spider-Man then." Peter joked. "I hardly use my legs at all."

"You know, I could just confine you to here instead of letting you stay in your room. It would make breaking out a lot more difficult."

"Ehe… no- no need for that. I won't go anywhere until you give me the a-okay. Promise."

Bruce smirked. "That's what I though. Come on now, I'll help you to your room and get someone to bring you something. I know you haven't eaten since this morning. Your fast metabolism and loss of blood isn't really the best combination."

"Thanks Dr. Banner. I could totally go for a pizza, or two."

It had been two days since that conversation and Peter was bored out of his mind. He's spent two days in his room reading science journals and making small adjustments to his web shooters and was getting stir crazy. He went downstairs to join the others once and enjoyed himself rather thoroughly but hated himself when he basically had to hop back up the stairs. Usually there was someone there, mainly Steve or Barnes because they were his closest neighbors, to keep him entertained or just chat but everyone was busy with the files. Natasha and Clint had gone off to infiltrate another compound to see if they could get more information, Steve and Barnes had gone to make a report about why their stealth mission ended with a bang but were due back any minute, he didn't even know what Vision and Wanda were up to, he didn't remember the last time he's seen Sam, and Bruce and Tony were busy in the lab. He envied them and their two working legs.

He had his food brought up to him, which he was grateful for, scarfing down everything that was on the tray, then going to bed a a relatively early time. No one woke him and no one had any problems with bringing him his food whenever he felt hungry.

The fourth morning though he got a wake up call. It wasn't from any of the others but from his senses alerting him of danger. His eyes popped open and there was a masked face in front of him, lying in his bed.

"Good morning sleeping beauty."

Peter let out a yell and tumbled out of bed.

"Come on, I can't be the worst face you've every woken up to. You haven't even seen my face yet." The man he recognized as Deadpool, Wade, whatever said.

"What are you doing here? How did you even get in here?" Peter basically squeaked out. "Why were you _watching me sleep?"_

"You have something I need. See the reason I was in that place in the first place is because those files are mine, by some sort of legal right I'm sure. I just want the flash drive you took from that compound and then I'll be out of your hair for good. Well, maybe not for good. I'll probably see you around and whatever."

"Wha-?"

"Come on, where is it?" Wade took a step towards him."I know you're not stupid enough to keep it in here so I need you to tell me so I can get it and be out of your hair. Unless you enjoy our time together then I suppose I could be persuaded to let borrow them for a bit while we get to know each other a little better." He wiggled his brows

Peter rapidly shook his head and drew both his legs to his chest and kicked out hard, hitting Wade and sending him back to crash into the table. He then scrambled up and exited his room as fast as he could. "FRIDAY emergency. Code w-" he barely got ten steps before he was tackled.

" _Mr. Stark has been alerted for improper use of emergency protocol. He will be here momentarily. Would you like me to alert the others until his arrival?"_

"No thanks AI lady, now we're both gonna be embarrassed." Wade said as he sat up. "I really didn't want to have to do this but…" He put his knee directly on Peter's wound and a cloth over his mouth to muffle the scream that was coming out. "Shh, shh, let the drugs do their work. You know chloroform doesn't work instantly like in the movies but since you have heightened senses, it works just as fast."

True to his words, Peter felt the affect of the drug almost instantly. His eyes became heavy and his mind fuzzy. The only thing really keeping him awake was the pain that was going through his leg. As he was on the verge of passing out, he heard footsteps and a door opening and was rewarded when he saw the feet of James Barnes step into view.

"Oh shit." He heard Wade say before he was flung off his back.

"FRIDAY lockdown. Code word Winter." Barnes said as he eyed the man now laying amongst broken wood from the banister on the first floor.

" _Acknowledged. Lockdown initiated."_ As the AI finished her sentence, an alarm went off and shutters started closing on the windows and outside leading doors.

Barnes knelt by the boy at his feet and assessed the damage he's been dealt. "You okay kid?"

Peter let out a weak moan. "I-I think I'm g-gonna take a nap Mr. Barnes."

"Try to stay awake. We don't know if you have a concussion." A second door opened and Steve pealed out of it. "Nice of you to join in. I didn't know you were such a heavy sleeper."

"What the hell happened?" He asked as he took in the downed boy in front of him.

"We have unexpected company." He gestured to the broken banister.

Steve peered to the floor below to see a familiar suited man trying to learn up from down. "He's the same guy that was at the compound four days ago. How did he get in?"

"He- he was laying on my bed." Peter weakly replied as he was helped into a sitting position. "He was t-there when my senses woke me up. Ah, you guys ever b-been shot before? I mean you've been i-in the army and an Avenger way longer that I-I've even been alive and, I gotta say it hurts way m-more now since it started bleeding again and, wow I feel like I should go back to sleep."

"Stay awake just a little longer son. Banner will be here soon." Steve told him as he opted to take the stairs down to apprehend the culprit.

"Wow he packs a hard punch." Wade said, still wobbling as he stood.

Steve took one of his arms and twisted it behind his back, forcing him to the ground. "Who are you? How'd you get in here?"

"Ow owowowow. I give I give! Have mercy!" He cried as the Cap's knee went onto his back to hold him down.

"Will _someone_ explain exactly _why_ the lockdown protocol was triggered _twice_ at 5:37 in the morning?" Tony's voice echoed through the hall as he and Bruce stepped off the elevator seeing as they had locked themselves in the lab hours ago, the dark circles under their eyes showing they hadn't slept in a while. His eyes hardened as he caught sight of Steve kneeling down on someone. "What the hell is this sonofabitch doing here?"

Steve nodded to the second level. "Buck found him attacking Peter; don't know how he got in or how he even found this place."

"I wasn't _attacking_ him, just- showing tough love." Wade grunted. "Why is that so hard for everyone to comprehend? The audience understands I'm sure."

"Hey you, emo candy cane, shut up. No one said you can talk." Tony shot out, ignoring the strange commentary as Bruce ascended the stairs to find Peter lying against the Winter Soldier.

"Heeeey doc. Fine morning we're having." Peter gave him a tired smile. "Don't suppose I could trouble you for a donut or something."

"I'm sure we can find something. How do you feel?" Bruce asked as he took a look at the boy's head.

"Like a million bucks. Ha, get it?" Peter weakly looked at Barnes who rolled his eyes. "Leg hurts but o-other than that I'm just tired."

"I don't see any head injuries. Let's get you somewhere- else so I can check your leg." He went to check the boy's room while Bucky helped him to his feet. "Uh, your room seems to be disheveled. Barnes would you mind-?"

"Course not." The three of them headed to Barnes' room while the others dealt with the intruder downstairs.

"FRIDAY, care to inform my why your alarm didn't go off when the outside perimeter was breached?" Tony asked, annoyed.

" _I'm not certain. Please wait a moment while I check to make sure all systems are running properly."_ The AI said before going silent.

"How he even found this place is my question." Steve voiced.

"Ahem, _he_ is right here, getting his collarbone crushed at the moment." Wade called out. "Look if you want to have a nice, civil chat, maybe have some tea and cookies to calm everyone down, I'm _totally_ for that option."

"Cap do me a favor and break his jaw."

"Whoa, who pissed in your cereal this morning? Why do you hate me so much?"

"You threw a _glitter bomb_ in my face."

"Ahaha, classic Wade." He shook his head. "But I'm all seriousness, up, please?"

"If you wanted to be civil then maybe you shouldn't have attacked Peter." Bruce said as he and Barnes descended the stairs.

"How is he?" Cap asked.

"All right, pulled two stitches but other than that he's fine."

"For the last time, I didn't attack him. I was merely trying to attain an object, which belongs to me by the way, from his person." Wade whined.

"Explain why you were deliberately pressing on his injured leg and trying to drug him when I found you." The soldier crosses his arms.

"Plan b?"

" _Boss, it appears as a number of my alarms and safety protocols are offline and have been offline since before Mr. Parker was attacked in his bedroom. The outward boarder security has has new limits set and the secondary alarm system has been completely disabled. I was unaware any changes had been made to my system_."

Tony crossed his arms and adjusted his posture. "Lemme get this straight, first you show up out of nowhere and completely botch our mission, which is the reason the kid got injured in the first place, then you somehow manage to locate our compound and disable the security protocols in place, then break into the kid's room and injure him further before eyeliner over there found you attempting to drug him on top of everything. Does that about sum it up?"

"Yeah." Wade nodded. "Yeah just about."

"You forgot the part where he climbed in Peter's bed and watched him sleep before he woke up." Bruce nonchalantly added.

"Oh, great. So you're not just a sonofabitch but a perverted sonofabitch." Tony threw his hands up in frustration. "Will you put him in a holding cell or something? It's too damn early for this."

With that said, Steve and Barnes lead Wade to the elevator and headed down to containment. Tony huffed at the sight of the ruined banister and gave FRIDAY instructions to call someone to fix it before checking Peter's room for extensive damages. A few knocked over things and hole in the wall near the desk but other than that it looked like a normal teenagers room.

"What do you think we should do now?" Bruce asked as he also took in the destruction of Peter's room. "Considering he was able to find and break in, it appears he's pretty intelligent and talented. I wouldn't put it passed him to attempt a breakout."

"FRIDAY bring up surveillance and audio of the Grandpa and Eyeliner for us." Tony tiredly sighed.

A hologram screen popped up from his watch, showing Steve and Barnes escorting the very chatting prisoner to a containment cell.

" _Come on guys. It doesn't have to be like this."_ Wade sighed as he was placed in the cell. _"If you just read through the files you're gonna find a Wade Wilson, aka_ me, _and then you're all gonna have to say sorry for wrongful imprisonment of a good guys. Well, not a good guy in the traditional sense, I mean I've done some raunchy shit in my days but it was for the greater good. The greater good!"_

" _We have looked through the files. There's no mention of anyone named Wade Wilson."_ Cap calmly stated.

" _I've never heard of a so called good guy breaking and entering someone's personal room."_ Barnes added.

" _Yeah okay I get that but what goes on in a room of two consenting adults isn't really a topic for this story."_

The two soldiers looked at each other. _"Consenting adult? The kid's not even seventeen yet."_

The room was silent for a moment.

" _WHAT? No! He just started senior in high school! His birthday is October 18_ _th_ _and it's currently January so that means he's legal!"_

" _I don't know where you got your information but he just turned sixteen, still a minor."_

" _Sixteen!? Are you kidding me? The timeline for this story is all wrong! I'm two years too early. Oh god, I_ am _a perverted sonofabitch!"_

" _At least you admitted something truthful."_ Barnes shrugged.

The screen went dark and Tony rolled his eyes. "We could turn him over to the UN or something."

"How did he know his birthday?" Bruce asked.

"Probably looked on the kid's wiki or something look, I don't like this guy. So I want to get rid of him as soon as we can."

"You're mad about the bomb aren't you?" He smirked.

"No I'm concerned because he was able to get through my security like it was nothing. How many people do you know that can do that _from the outside_?"

Bruce tilted his head. "I get where you're coming from but I think we should wait, at least until Nat and Clint get back."

"That's three days from now. What would that accomplish?"

"If they bring back the file then-"

"Oh come on Bruce." Tony huffed. "You don't believe about that do you?"

"Tony do you know many people that can survive a direct punch to the face from Barnes _without_ having any sort of immediate complications to speech patterns or difficulty walking or standing by themselves? He doesn't even have armor for gods sake. It's obvious he has some sort of enhancement."

"Okay, okay you know what? Okay." Tony surrendered. "He stays locked up until they get back. If, _if_ we do find his name on file, then what?"

Bruce shrugged. "We could use his help to find the site for all of this."

Tony gave him a blank stare then begin to walk away. "It's too early for this."

 **Weeee. This was a fun chapter to write.**

 **I hope you guys enjoyed the little tidbits of wall breaks and everything. Also I'm using various sources to find personal information for everyone but there's not too much to go on because a lot of characters don't have full, complete backstories and don't really mention things like birth years or anything. If you have any information pertaining to any of the characters mentioned so far, I'd be grateful if you shared it and feel free to correct me on incorrect things.**

 **Also, there will be inconsistent updates so don't expect a chapter every day.**

 **Please point out any grammatical or spelling errors you see so I may fix them in the future!**

 **Hope you liked it. See ya later!**


	3. Chapter 3

The compound after the incident was in a peaceful silence for the most part: Peter was sleeping the rest of the morning away, Tony was looking through FRIDAY's mainframe trying to figure out exactly what systems and protocols were down, Bruce was making himself food, Barnes had gone to the training room, which left Steve to monitor Deadpool for the time being. He didn't mind it per say, but he did wish the man could keep his mouth shut for more than three minutes at a time. He had this sort of air around him that just felt- strange and Steve couldn't decide if it was in a good or bad way.

"Hey Cap, how did you first feel when you got recognized as the Cap?"

The question had come right after a story about how he'd killed dozens of aliens for stealing people's coin wishes from a fountain, whether it was true or not Steve didn't know. He set down the papers he was looking through. "It was strange; a tiny, asthmatic kid from Brooklyn suddenly becoming world famous was definitely something different."

"No like, how did the kids react?"

"Like they met a celebrity. Most of them laughing and running away while a few brave ones actually came up to talk. Why?"

Wade sat there in silence for a second. "I know you don't believe me when I say I'm a good guy, you know loose definition of _good,_ I swear to you that I'm telling the truth about those files. I'd _really_ appreciate if you guys would let me just take a look."

Steve sighed. "Look, I believe your heart is in the right place but after the stunt you pulled at the enemy compound and what you did this morning, we can't afford to take any chances with anything."

"Come oooon, I did _not_ know he was underage! I'm a good guy! I would never do anything like that! All the readers know and the writer should feel deeply ashamed for making it happen." Steve raised an eye at the statement. "Whatever then. I made a mistake and I'm truly sorry. Can you at least tell me when I'm getting out of here? It's been like three weeks already."

"You've only been in there for around six hours." He began looking over the papers again. "We're waiting for other team members to get back with more intel on this whole thing. We'll decide what to do after that."

Wade shrugged. "That's something I guess."

" _Captain."_ FRIDAY's voice came over the speakers. _"Boss requires your presence in the main quarters."_

"What about him?" He gestured towards Wade.

" _My servers all appear to be in working order. There should be no issue in leaving him on his own for now."_

"Tell Tony I'll be right there."

"Hey Cap." Steve turned one last time towards Wade before exiting the room. "Just in case my name isn't on the files, keep a lookout for Trial 2463."

 **AVENGERS**

A groan escaped Peter's mouth as he woke.

" _Good afternoon Mr. Parker. I hope you had a decent sleep and are well rested. You entered stage three REM sleep at approximately 9:26am. How are you feeling?"_ FRIDAY greeted.

"Like I got hit by a truck." Peter answered as he stretched. "What time is it?"

" _It's currently 1:48pm. You have been asleep for a little longer than seven hours since you had gone back to sleep this morning."_

He looked around and remembered he had taken refuge in Barnes' room. "Where is everyone?"

" _They are all conversing in the kitchen. Would you like me to contact them to give you assistance?"_

"No, no I'm fine. What happened to the guy from earlier?" He got out of bed and carefully stood, testing the weight limit of his leg.

" _He is currently in one of the containment cells in the lower levels. He talks in a strange manner and tells- interesting stories."_

After discerning his leg wouldn't give him too much trouble he strode from his temporary room to his own to get changed, minding the still broken banister as he did. "What kind of stories?"

" _They almost seem like works of fiction but, he speaks of being killed on numerous occasions but also killing on numerous occasions. I have figured out he has a deep hatred for someone called Francis."_

"How about how he speaks? What's so strange about it?" His room had been cleaned up a bit; the things that were knocked to the ground in the scuffle had been placed in their rightful places again, though there was still the matter of the hole in his wall.

FRIDAY was silent for a moment. _"I'm not sure how to describe it. He knows things that shouldn't be known but he also gets a lot of his facts mixed up. He has also been requesting crayons and paper."_

Peter raised his brow. "Does he want to color or something?"

" _That would be a logical guess."_

He rolled his eyes and began to change from his pajamas. His wound had been healing nicely despite the fact it has been slightly worsened hours ago. He asked Bruce not to bother with the stitches that had torn because they would have most likely healed overnight anyways, which they did. One more day maybe and the rest could probably be taken out.

"Has anyone found out anything with the files or whatever?"

" _Research is still inconclusive. Mr. Barton and Ms. Romanoff are due back within two days. More information should come with their return."_

"Right. Thanks." He slipped on a pair of shorts and a grey shirt that said _I Make Hilarious Science Puns Periodically_ and more or less began to hobble from the room.

" _One more thing before you leave Mr. Parker."_ He stopped for a moment. _"Boss has told me to inform you that there is a guest in the compound."_

Peter raised a brow at that and left his room. A guest in the compound? Who? He didn't even know they got guests. His mind first went to Fury but the thought was quickly discarded because as far as he knew, Fury had no reason to contact them. Plus he hadn't been woken up by airship turbines while he was sleeping. Pepper was his second thought but there had been no form of communication to indicate she was coming, to him at least. She would always send at least a text to him saying she was dropping by. He started hearing voices as he ventured towards the open area of the compound.

Maybe it was someone from the government who was coming to deal with the guy they had locked up downstairs. How would they have even found out about it so fast? _He_ still didn't fully understand what had happened. Maybe they had come to yell at them even more than they already did, or maybe they came to yell at _him_ specifically because it was his fault for getting caught by that guy and in turn blowing the place up and they had come to tell him that he was out of the Avengers and he had to go back to living a normal life in Queens and-

"Hey Pete. Get enough sleep?" Bruce's words brought him from his thoughts. He hadn't realized he had already gone downstairs and into the living area. "How's the leg?"

"Uh, fine Dr. Banner." He sputtered out. "Great in fact. I can just about put all my weight on it. Still feel pretty sore all over though. N-not I'm like a bad way if that's even possible. I mean it kinda feels like after a day of training with- Cap and…"

Peter trailed off as he noted the faces in the room: Steve had been standing by one of the doors leading to an outside veranda, Bruce and Barnes were sitting on one of the couches, Tony sitting across from them in one of the chairs looking over a file. There was a fifth person in the room that he had never met but instantly knew who it was. His eyes went wide and he started sputtering.

"You- y-you're-!"

"Told you he wouldn't be able to handle it." Tony said nonchalantly.

"Give the kid a break." Steve said, not bothering to hide a small smile. "I'm sure this is his first time meeting a god."

Peter stood in awe as the man introduced himself.

"Greetings young Midgardian. I am Thor, Son of Odin. It is an honor to meet you."

"O-oh yeah. It's real n-nice to meet you too." The boy managed to stutter out. "I'm Peter. This- this is just like… so, oh man Ned is gonna be so jealous."

"Sorry Tony, I think the kid has a new favorite." Bruce joked, earning laughs from the others. Tony rolled his eyes at the remark.

"I have heard many things about you Young Peter, for they say you are the Man of Spiders and have a significant amount of strength and righteousness." Thor smiled and placed his hand on the boy's shoulders. "I am glad that we will be together for a period of time."

"Yeah that's awesome!" Peter's smile became one entwined with confusion. "Wait, you're gonna stay?"

"Sparky here is going to be an extra set of eyes when we need him." Tony said as he put the file down.

Thor nodded. "Though I do not know that of which you are looking for, I shall do what I can."

" _Boss."_ FRIDAY rang out. _"The prisoner is requesting an audience."_

"I guess now is as good of a time as ever to show Sparky what we caught this morning." The six of them headed to the elevator. Barnes placed a hand on Peter's shoulder.

"You sure you're good? No one would blame you if you wanted to sleep longer."

Peter cracked a smile. "I'm fine Mr. Barnes, and thanks for letting me stay in your room. Hope I didn't inconvenience you with it. I mean my room didn't seem to bad when I was in there earlier so I wouldn't have minded if I was just put back there but I guess you guys needed to check on how he got in and everything, in which case I probably wouldn't have gotten as much sleep but- aah, I mean thanks very much. I'll shut up now."

 **AVENGERS**

" _Finally._ I didn't think anyone would come down to see me. I've been lonely." Wade said as the six men funneled into the room. "I mean leave me a tv with the news or something. Did anyone bring the crayons I asked for?"

"What do you want?" Tony asked, annoyed.

"So that's a no for the crayons then." He caught sight of Peter. "Hi Spidey. I hope that we can get passed our rough meetings. What say you that we kiss and make up?"

Peter shifted on his feet, making it so he was mostly behind the others.

" _What do you want_?" He asked a second time.

"I _want_ out of this god forsaken box!" Wade yelled. "It's horrible in here! There's nothing to do! It's too quiet! The robot lady can only provide me with so much entertainment! I'm a human being, I need social interaction!"

"All right." Barnes piped in. He grabbed a chair and placed it in front of the cell and sat in it. "Who are you?"

Wade growled in annoyance. "I said _interaction,_ not _interrogation_."

"Same difference." He shrugged.

"Fine. I'll play your stupid game." He sat crosslegged in the middle of the cell. "My name is Wade Wilson. I was born in a secret little town in Canada in 19XX and- wait, did I just say 19XX? Why did I say that? Why can't I say 19XX? What the hell is wrong with this universe!?"

"Did this man hit his head perhaps?" Thor sincerely asked.

"Seriously?! You people don't see anything wrong with 19XX?"

"You're literally just repeating a year over and over screaming about something." Bruce said.

Wade grunted. "Fine, fine. Whatever. I was born- _that_ year and moved to the states when I was like twenty-three or something. Then I met this guy named Francis. _Huge_ asshole; promised to cure me of my cancer but all he seemed to do was disfigure me and make me sterile. Now while I was there, I was know as 2463 and endured all the torture he dished out. Low and behold they actually managed to _do_ something tome and now, my beautiful face looks like an overripe avocado and I can't seem to actually die. So now, I need the files that _you_ have so I can track down Francis' friends so they can make me normal again."

"Why not just track the man himself?" Steve asked.

"Oh I did and I killed him." His tone was a little too chipper. "Kidnapped my girlfriend-wife and everything, so I killed him."

"But if you needed him to make you yourself again-"

"Oh no, nononono, they _can't_ put me back to how I was. Francis may have been a huge asshole but he wasn't lying when he said I was stuck like this. So I need to find _other_ crazy scientists to put my DNA _back_ to how it was so I can finally die in peace."

"So, are you trying to say that you're- immortal?" Tony asked skeptically.

"It sounds so much more believable when someone else says it. Aaaand now that I said that, none of you believe me." He stood up and pulled a very small gun. "You guys don't wanna know how uncomfortable it was hiding this thing."

"Uh, he has a gun. How does he have a gun?" Peter said, wide eyed.

"FRIDAY open the cell." Tony commanded.

" _Initiating temporary lockdown for prisoner movement."_ The procedure only took about thirty seconds but even then it was too long.

"Someone might wanna cover the kid's eye. This is gonna be _real_ messy." He placed the gun to him temple and pulled the trigger just as one of the cell walls was lowering to the ground.

The bang echoed in the room. Wade's body was slumped on the floor, blood pouring from his head like a faucet. They all turned their heads away from the sight. Peter's mind was racing. He'd seen death before but…

He didn't even realize he was being lead away and back to the elevator. "Come on son. You don't need to see that."

 **AVENGERS**

It had been a few hours since the incident. Everyone had been sitting in the living area. Peter had been staring at nothing for the good side of an hour. The others had been going back and forth about what they should with the, now dead man in the lower levels. Tony had the brilliant idea of actually researching what Wade had told them to see if his story checked out or not. While he didn't find anything that directly tied into the story, he found several articles about a group called Weapon-X that did human experimentation with trying to give them superhuman abilities. The leader of the whole thing, a guy named _Francis_ , had been found dead in a shipping yard after years of experiments.

Peter felt sick when Tony informed them that, while it wasn't a complete match, Wade's story had checked out. He could've helped them get closer to HYDRA but…

He flinched slightly as a mug of cocoa was shoved into his hands. Bruce took a seat next to him. "That's quite a stare you got going there Pete. How's your leg?"

He took a sip from the mug. "Thanks. I'm… I'm okay Dr. Banner. It only feels like a small pinch now."

Bruce nodded. "That's good. I suppose I could take the stitches out by the end of the night." Peter nodded in acknowledgement but stayed silent. "Okay kid, come on, out with it."

He put the mug to his lips but then put it on the table. "I just- I feel like we could've done something. He was so persistent but we didn't believe him and, he just-"

"No one knew that would happen. He shouldn't have had any weapons. We didn't know his motives at the compound or when we discovered him this morning."

Peter sighed. "I guess but, it still doesn't feel right." He stood up. "Thanks for trying to make me feel better Dr. Banner."

With that, he strode out of the room.

"Kid's not taking this whole thing too well is he?" The Winter Soldier asked.

Bruce huffed in defeat. "Can you blame him? After his uncle…"

"He doesn't think this is his fault does he?"

"Somehow I think he does; kid's too good and pure for his own sake."

Barnes nodded. "Nothing we can do about it though, only wait for Romanoff and Barton to get back with more information to actually explain all of this." The two of them sat in a comfortable silence, listening to the others murmurs for a few moments before-

" _Guys!"_ A yell pierced the disturbingly calm atmosphere of the room. The others were on their feet in seconds rushing to the source. When they turned a corner, they saw Peter sitting on the ground in front of the elevator, though their gazes were held in the person who was inside of it.

Wade Wilson was standing in the open doors.

"Man, you guys will not _believe_ the day I've had."

 **I love writing wall breaks so much. And whoa did it get a little meta there at the end. I'm trying to make it funny I swear but it's ending up angsty.**

 **Please point out any spelling or grammatical errors I might have missed so I can fix them in the future! Remember, more reviews means faster updates.**

 **Hope you liked it. See ya later!**


	4. Chapter 4

It had all been a bit much for him to handle. Peter felt bad for basically giving Bruce the cold shoulder when he was just trying to help but he needed to do something to take his mind off of what happened. He could still hear the ringing in his ears from the the shot. He decided to head to the lab to try and make a new type of web to try out. He called to FRIDAY and asked her to bring the elevator up and take him to the labs. When it arrived and opened its doors though, rather than take a step forward into it, he stumbled back and fell.

Standing in the elevator, very much _alive_ was the very man he saw shoot himself in the head hours earlier.

"We just keep running into each other during awkward moments." Wade said, scratching his chin.

"Guys!" Peter shouted in hopes of getting the others attention. He didn't believe what he was seeing. The group rounded the corner in a matter of seconds.

"You guys will not _believe_ the day I've had." Wade said upon them showing up. "I mean you guys should know since you were there. I wish you were there when I got up though, I had a whole zombie routine I was gonna do but nooo, lets all just leave Wade in the basement on a cold hard table. Be honest, were you gonna cut me open to see what made me tick?"

"Am- am I not correct when I say this man should be very dead?" Thor asked.

"It's not possible." Bruce said.

" _Not possible?_ You're standing here with a god, two people that are like 100 years old, you look _fabulous_ by the way _,_ a kid with spider powers, while you yourself literally turn into a big green guy when you get pissed. Why is me being alive the hardest thing to understand?"

"You- you shot yourself point blank in the head." Peter said. "And were legally dead for about three hours."

He stepped out of the elevator and squatted in front of the kid. "Are you saying you were worried for me?" Before Peter could answer, Wade launched himself into him with a hug causing them to fall back. "This day just got like 87% better just knowing that."

"Okay you know what? No." Tony stated as Steve pulled Wade off Peter and he pulled said boy behind him. "I don't know what you're trying to pull but it's physically impossible and completely goes-"

"Want to see my cut my hand off?" Wade interrupted.

" _What?"_

"Would you, Mr. Tony Stark, and the rest of you fine gentlemen, like to see me cut my hand off? I mean if You need even more convincing then I guess I can do that. Don't worry, it'll grow back just like my head did. Oh yeah, sorry about the mess you had to clean up. Let's hope you burned it or something so it doesn't turn into Evil Deadpool because, _whoa_ you guys don't wanna have to deal with him."

An uncomfortable silence hung in the air before Bruce spoke. "Maybe we could just get a blood sample and run a few tests to- uh, to see what happened with- everything."

"Really? In all fairness I'd prefer to cut off my hand because I really don't like needles. By the way you guys got any food? I got the munchies."

 **AVENGERS**

After a quick and rather awkward snack break, Wade had been lead to medbay by Bruce, Barnes, and Thor. Peter tagged along because he was confused and interested at the whole thing. Tony didn't enjoy the fact that everyone seemed rather calm around him and went to check for any sort of other information on him; Steve took the liberty of calling Fury and even some people at the UN to see if they could offer any information on him. Bruce had taken the liberty of removing the rest of Peter's stitches before starting anything else.

"Are you _suuuure_ you don't wanna see me cut off my hand?" Wade asked as he sat on one of the tables.

"For the last time, _no._ " Bruce said.

"Come oooon. It only takes like a day to do. How about you Spidey?" He turned to Peter who had been helping ready chemicals. "It's like a lizard tail, only it's _super_ bloody and I can do it multiple times."

Peter's eyes went wide and turned away from him.

"You really think that'll make him interested?" Barnes raised an eyebrow.

"He a teenage boy _apparently._ Isn't that what they find cool?"

Barnes scoffed. "The kid doesn't enjoy blood. He nearly vomited with seeing you earlier."

"Hey, you haven't even seen- oooh you mean with me and the blowing my brains out. Yeaaaah, probably not the smartest thing I coulda done."

"That's the understatement of the century." He rolled his eyes.

A few minutes later and a lot of Deadpool whining, Bruce had finally gotten the blood he needed and began running tests to see what he could find. Peter had been sitting on one of the stools, not bothering to hide his glances at the man who had been complaining about his arm hurting and feeling violated.

"My devilish charm finally won you over Petey?" He said as the caught the boy's eye. "I knew it was only a matter of time before it happened. Even if you are younger than I had expected, I'll wait for you to be legal before anything happens."

"No, _definitely_ not." Peter stated.

"Then will you stop undressing me with your eyes?" A teasing tone in his words.

Peter blinked, got up from where he had been sitting and announced that he was heading back upstairs.

" _Aw wait Petey! I was just joking!"_

 **AVENGERS**

"Where's the kid FRIDAY?" Tony asked when he checked the video feed from the lab.

" _Mr. Parker is in his room. He seems a bit upset about something, though when I confronted him about it, he told me it was nothing."_ The AI responded.

That was never a good sign. Peter being upset about something usually put a damper on everyone's moods, and it normally meant him going out and doing something rash like an idiot. The last time something like that happened it landed him in the hospital for six days.

"What's he doing?"

" _He is currently lying on his bed looking towards the ceiling and has been like that for the past 13 minutes and 48 seconds. He also denied the idea that he was hungry when he hasn't eaten a decent amount of food in hours."_

Yep. He was planning to do something stupid.

Tony sighed and stretched as he got out of the chair he'd been sitting in for the last hour. He didn't find any hardcore evidence about anything Wade had said but he found dozens of small articles that had mentioned him doing cities _great deeds in a horrible manner._ He exited the lab and ventured to Peter's room.

Peter himself had been doing a lot of thinking. He still couldn't completely comprehend that Wade was very much alive and how he acted like nothing happened. Perhaps it was because it reminded him how Ben died, except he didn't wake up and walk away from it. Did he think the whole thing was unfair? To a point yes but did he think Wade actually should've died? Of course not. He was a superhero for crying out loud. He always did his best to make sure _no one_ died or was unhappy.

His mind drifted to his Aunt May and a wave of homesickness washed over him. Her finding out he was Spider-Man was a difficult time for both of them but May ultimately accepted what he was doing and supported him on it. When the rest of the world found out, it was a whole different type of hell. No one even knew how it happened but Peter was suddenly swarmed by nearly every media outlet in New York after school, asking how he became Spider-Man and why he finally decided to reveal his identity. He had retreated back into the school with Ned and hid in an empty classroom and while he was having a near full blown panic, Ned had called Tony to see if he had any information.

The jist of everything when Peter and Ned had finally been able to escape the school was someone up high had sent an anonymous tip and picture to a news station. It took mere hours for the news to spread. Since then, Peter had to leave school and Aunt May had to take on a new alias and move out of New York for her own protection. He didn't remember the last time he had a conversation with her, or Ned for that matter. Yeah he was still Spider-Man and everyone knew, but he didn't want to put his friend through the complete media shitstorm again, nor did he want to unwillingly put him in danger if he could help it.

 _Up high._ Everyone had known it was Ross that had let that information slip but him actually _knowing_ Peter was Spider-Man was a complete mystery.

That's what had brought him to thinking about what Wade was going through; he had been given something he didn't want with no way to reverse it and it most likely was the government's fault. He didn't know how it was connected but, he knew he wanted to help.

A knock on his door startled him from his thoughts and Tony entered. "How you doing kid? A little birdie told me you haven't eaten in a while and we both know that's never a good sign for anyone."

Peter sat up, rolling his eyes knowing that FRIDAY had rattled on him. "It's just, a lot to take in; brings back a lot of memories and, I just kinda feel useless all over again."

"You're gonna have to give me more than that to work with."

He shook his head. "He just- shot himself and, I dunno, it made me think of Uncle Ben. I know it's stupid and the two have no relation what so ever but just seeing him on the ground with blood pooling out everywhere, I can't help it. Sorry I know this is really stupid and with everything we've done I should probably be used to it-"

"Okay I'm going to stop you right there." Tony interrupted. "There's nothing for you to apologize for. What happened with your uncle was traumatic and it hasn't even been three years since it's happened. You're _going_ to have things that set you off and there's nothing wrong with that."

"I know but…" Peter sighed. "I want to help him Mr. Stark. I know he's weird and says a lot of stupid things but he doesn't really seem like a bad guy. He seems like he just wants his life back."

"I know kid." Tony scratched the back of his head. Why did he have to be such a good hearted kid? "Look, I can't promise that we're going to be able to do anything but depending on what Nat and Clint bring back, we might be able to help him with- something." Peter nodded. "Now how about something to eat? I know you're probably going to die from starvation any minute."

That made him smirk but he shook his head. "I know FRIDAY told you something but in all sincerity Mr. Stark, I'm really not hungry."

Tony's brow furrowed. "You better not be planning to do anything by yourself. You're barely even healed. We don't need you bed bound again."

"I wasn't even going to go out as Spider-Man tonight. Dr. Banner hasn't given me the a-okay yet."

"I'm sure Brucey would say it's fine if you asked," he paused. "But it's probably best if you give it a day to fully heal." Peter nodded. "Well, uh, if you change your mind there'll probably be pizza downstairs."

"Thank you Mr. Stark. I think I might work on my web shooters a bit more."

Tony gave the boy one last look before shutting his door. He obviously wasn't in a good state of mind at the moment and needed his space. He would ask FRIDAY how he was doing a little later. The conversation He heard as he descended the stairs was something he wished he could ignore.

"Pleeeeeease. Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease-"

"For the final time, no. I will not take you to Asgard to visit."

"Come ooooon. Just for a few minutes." Wade whined.

"We could always put you back in the box. I'm sure it would solve a lot of problems. I'm sure Stark would enjoy it." Barnes pointed out.

"Very much actually." Tony commented. "Actually Thor, why don't you go ahead and take him there? Might as well leave him while you're at it."

"I have already got my brother to deal with. I am not adding this one." Thor said.

He shrugged. "Worth a try. Okay Brucey. What's the verdict?"

Bruce shook his head. "I don't know what to tell you Tony. His blood and DNA share somethings in common with Peter's. He appears to have the same rapid healing but his is more- extreme and developed. His cell regeneration is more than double what Peter's is. I don't know what to tell you besides that. The man literally shot himself in the head and is completely fine. He appears to be telling the truth about what happened to him. We just need more facts to back his claim up."

"Yeah that's what I was worried about. I found dozens of old articles about him ' _cleaning the scum off the street in disgusting manners_ '." He used air quotes for the last part.

"I'll bet."

"Are you guys talking about me?" Wade suddenly popped in between them. "It's rude to talk about people behind their backs."

"Will you sit down?" Barnes pulled his shoulder and forced him on the couch.

"Hey where's Spidey? It's real boring without him here."

"I was also wondering where the Man of Spiders has gone." Thor voiced as well.

"Kid's in his room taking a nap." Tony answered.

"It's dinner time though. I'll go wake him!" Wade jumped up from the couch but was immediately forced back down.

"Thor, show him your hammer will you?" Tony said as he ushered Bruce out of their hearing range, spotting Thor placing the Mjolnir on Deadpool's lap, effectively trapping him.

"Pete's not sleeping is he?" Bruce asked when they were in the next room.

Tony shook his head. "He's having flashbacks of his uncle's death thanks to the idiot shooting himself in the head in front of him. He just needs some space right now."

Bruce gave a half nod. "Well what are we going to do about the guest in the living room?"

"Maybe we can pawn him off on Fury."

"Fury said he doesn't know anything about this guy." The two scientists turned to see Steve walking up. "Never heard of him before but said he'd look through old records to see if he could find any mention of his name or the guys that had him."

"How about anyone from the UN?" Bruce asked.

"The agent I spoke to said if we wanted information we'd have to go through the CIA and that means we'd most likely get Ross."

"Of course." Bruce shook his head. "Well looks like the only thing we can do is wait for Nat and Clint to get back, or a call from Fury. It's a race to see which happens first. And that means-"

"-he's going to have to stay here until we have viable information." Steve finished. The two of them looked to Tony.

"Ah shit."

 **God, there's so much angst. Also can you see how much I believe in Irondad?**

 **Please inform me of any spelling or grammatical errors so I might fix them in the future! Remember to leave a review! It's basically food for the writers!**

 **Hope you liked it. See ya later!**


	5. Chapter 5

In all fairness, it's wasn't _that_ bad having Wade there. At least not as bad as it could've been. Thor was the unlucky one that was in charge of him during the nights but the Asgardian didn't find him very difficult to deal with. He found Wade was very easily entertained by all his stories of him and Loki on Asgard. If he was being difficult, all he had to do was place his hammer on him to make him settle.

The morning that followed was strange to say the least. Wade had insisted he wanted to cook and despite everyone telling him no, he started making pancakes, lots and lots of pancakes.

"How did he manage to do that? Literally we were all watching him and somehow he managed to get into the kitchen and start cooking." Steve said.

"Will you guys _relax_?" Wade complained. "I may be a mercenary but I'm not going to poison you with pancakes. Consider this a thanks for… you know, I don't know what I have to thank you for but thanks anyways."

Thor had no problem with sitting and starting to eat. When the others saw no repercussions, they all followed in suit. Not longer after that, Peter came lazily down the stairs. He offered a nod at everyone's morning greeting and sat at the table, not giving a second glance to who was making breakfast, and started eating.

"You look like you had a rough night." Barnes said.

Peter nodded. "I was up late working on a new type of web but added too much of one compound so when I tried to actually use them, they sorta exploded. I was cleaning them for hours." The fact that he was also having nightmares whenever he got to sleep went unsaid.

"This is why I've told you not to experiment while you're tired." Tony chided. "At least you didn't set your room on fire this time."

"That was _one_ time." Peter defended.

"What kind of web were you trying to formulate?"

"Magnetic." Another plate of pancakes found its way in front of him. "I was able to get the compound right and everything, I just need to test it to see if it actually works."

"Does that mean training? Please tell me that means training." Wade said from the kitchen. "Pleasepleasepleaseplease- I made everyone breakfast."

"It doesn't mean training." Steve said.

"Actually Cap, I would need someone to test them out on."

 **AVENGERS**

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Thor asked as Peter and Wade took opposite sides of the training room.

"The kid can handle himself." Tony said though everyone was a bit unsure about the entire thing. "Okay Pete, what can we expect?"

"Theoretically speaking, depending on the polarity of the magnets that were in the web solution, it should either attract or repeal any metal object that comes towards it." Peter answered while fiddling with his web shooters. "Going on that, if the push or pull is strong enough then it should be able to pull bullets wherever the web is, or push them in a different direction. The only thing is I don't know if the polarity is positive or negative or if the magnets I used were strong enough to have an actual affect on a bullet traveling however fast they go. Now that I think about it, I didn't account for heat from the bullets either."

"An answer to your question, no, this isn't a good idea." Barnes said to Thor. "We don't even use live ammunition for when we train."

"Just so we're clear, I'm going to shoot _around_ you." Wade emphasized. "I know you have your weird sixth sense but no matter how you think about it, it is rather difficult to dodge a bullet."

Peter nodded and pulled on his mask. "Whenever you're ready."

Gun fire immediately started echoing in the room. It was a bit unnerving for everyone to watch. They knew Peter could handle himself but with an unknown person firing _live_ rounds at him, they couldn't help but be nervous.

Peter seemed like he was having a good time. Everyone could tell he was smiling under his mask. The web looked like it was working, not completely or how he had expected it to work, but working nonetheless. He could see the trajectory of the bullets changing slightly and the marks and holes in the floor helped to show it was having some sort of effect. The mock fight lasted less than ten minutes, Peter calling it to a stop when he ran out of the webbing, currently hanging upside down from the ceiling.

"On a scale of yes or no, how well do you think it worked?" Bruce called out to him.

"It worked better than I thought it would." Peter said as he pulled off his mask. "I need to research how heat affects magnets and probably try to make it so one shooter deals with the positive and the other deals with the negative. I'm not that versed in magnetism but-"

A sudden shot rang out and Peter went falling to the ground, only he dropped into Deadpool's arms. "I can teach you about magnets. Opposites attract and all that."

Peter shoved his hands into his face. "Nope. No. Not gonna happen."

"Come on, it'll be fun."

"Put the kid down Wade." Steve said as the rest of them approached.

He shrugged and dropped Peter. "Okay so who's next? That's how it goes isn't it? I know your super secret AI lady is taking notes on how I do things just in case. So instead of _invading my privacy,_ how about we just do it like normal people? …And now that I said that out loud, it makes it sound like I'm a pervert."

"You know what? Sure." Tony huffed. "You can take on Sparky and Eyeliner. It'll be entertaining."

The rest of the morning played out as such. Wade had taken on Thor and Barnes and held his own against them pretty well, all considering. Steve opted out of the impromptu training session along with Tony. Peter and Bruce had been idling chatting trying to come up with a solution to maximize and perfect to his new web scheme but even with all the formulas they had been running by Karen, the end result was all the same with virtually no change. Peter had decided to scrap that thought for new web.

It was barely one in the afternoon when they headed back upstairs. It was almost awkward. Most of the times when they were waiting for information, or just generally when they had down time, they were all off doing their own thing. It was like they were all babysitting. It wasn't even like that when Peter had first been there, given Tony was usually with him the first week or so when he was getting settled but still.

"So," Wade started. "How's about you finally lemme take a look at that file hmm? I mean I know how you guys must _love_ me being here and all but I do actually have a job to do. Not a real job like retail or anything but you get the idea."

"FRIDAY pull of the files from our last outing." Tony called out. Peter inwardly laughed at the thought of how much Tony wanted Wade gone that would make him change his mind at a snap. Diagrams and documents popped up one one of the tv screens. "This is all we got from the last compound. It doesn't provide anything useful except for a set of coordinates to which Birdbrain and Nat ventured off to."

"It does mention a Weapon-X though." Bruce chimed in. "Something about creating super humans through experimentation."

"I didn't even think you guys were in the same universe as them." Deadpool nonchalantly said, ignoring the strange looks. "They're something like that; they try to find your weakness then promise you redemption or some other bullshit. I can't believe I fell for it."

"How did they capture you?" Thor asked.

"They found out about my cancer; took advantage of my misfortune. Their little fake business man came looking for me and told me where I could meet them if I wanted the procedure done. Desperate times call for stupidly desperate measures."

It was silent for a moment before Peter spoke, almost a whisper. "Do you regret it?"

It was Wade'a turn to be silent then. He locked eyes with Peter through his mask. "Yeah, I guess I do. I have super advanced healing, whoop-de- _fucking-_ do, with what they did to me, I'd really prefer if I were dead. My skin hurts all the time and I can't walk around without a mask on because people stare too much." He took a breath. "All I want is to find the stupid sonsabitchs that did this and prevent it from happening to anyone else. _Whoa,_ now _that_ was meta. But then again, I'm pretty meta. You guys don't even know you're made up characters in a story. HA."

"We'll help you." Steve suddenly said. "We have a similar target of interest, might as well use all the help we can get."

Peter nodded silently, whole heartedly agreeing with Steve's words. They really did need all the help they could get; they found that last compound on a hunch and guesswork. He also knew Steve probably would've proposed the idea without knowing the full story because he hates everything so do with human experimentation.

"You know," Wade sniffed and rubbed his masked face as if he was crying. "You were like up here with respect and now you're like _waaaaay_ up here. Like I can't even begin to describe how this makes me feel so thanks, buuut no thanks."

"What?"

"I know what you're thinking and believe me, it's not you, it's me. I don't do well with groups of more than like three people. Don't worry though, you can have the house and the kid."

"You _don't_ want our help?" Barnes asked.

"No, yes. I mean, why don't we attack the same issue on two separate fronts and meet somewhere in the middle?" The group was silent. "We good? Cool. So I'm just gonna go ahead and- gooo…" he walked to the elevator. "Okay AI lady. Take me to the front door please."

" _Very well my dope-ass fresh prince."_

"Damn straight." The elevator door closed and he was out of sight.

The silence that has enveloped the group was still present among them, except Peter. His hands were over his mouth and was shaking with laughter. "Did- did FRIDAY just-"

"What the _hell_ just happened?" Tony nearly yelled. It was his tone that caused Peter to finally lose it. "FRIDAY, explanation."

" _Mr. Wilson requested that I not call him_ sir _while addressing him. When I asked what he would like to be called, his answer was such."_ The AI responded.

Tony shook his head and rolled his eyes. "Is he still here?"

" _No. He has just crossed the outer most boarder and is out of my sensor range."_

"You just let him leave? Just like that?"

" _I was under the impression that you wanted him out of the compound. That is why I saw no problem in letting him out the front door."_

He groaned. "You need some _serious_ tune ups." He turned to Peter who was doubled over with laughter. "Do you need to go to another room kid?"

"It's- it's just," Peter could hardly speak from laughing so hard. "I've _never_ heard FRIDAY say something like that. I didn't even think it was possible!"

Tony groaned. "What? You got something you wanna add Eyeliner? I see you smirking." Barnes held his hands up in surrender, no longer trying to hide the fact that he also found the situation ridiculously hilarious.

" _I_ want to know how he got to the farthest boarder so fast." Steve chimed in. "It's like a mile away and the time span wasn't even two minutes when you asked about it."

"Perhaps he has more superhuman abilities than just his healing." Thor supposed. "He did appear to have a speed boost when we were sparing."

Tony turned to Bruce. "You said he only had the healing."

"No, I believe I said his DNA shares a lot of similarities with Peter's." Bruce defended. "His healing factor was just the most prominent and different. If I didn't know better, I would've thought it was Peter's DNA after some sort of super mutation. Only thing that was really different was I don't think he has heightened senses."

"Great. That's great. I don't think I could think of how this could get any better." He huffed. "Are you _done_ Peter?"

Peter quieted a snort. "Yeah, yeah I'm done."

The rest of that day was uneventful. Things seemed to go back to normal, only Peter had begun to ask FRIDAY to call him something like she had called Deadpool. His plan was quickly thwarted when she reported said names to Tony and he instructed her to call him something different.

" _Dr. Banner requires your presence in_ _the lab, Underoos."_

Peter spit out his drink. " _What_ did you just call me?"

" _Boss has seen it fit to change your title to Underoos seeing as you were so intent on having a change earlier._ "

Of course. It was a funny joke. It became tremendously less though when his override command didn't work to try to change it back though. All he did was groan and tell the AI to inform Banner he would be there momentarily.

"Underoos, huh?" The words out of Bruce's mouth as Peter stepped from the elevator made him roll his eyes. "You thinking of changing that legally?"

"Can we just, not? Please?" He sat on a stool. "Do you need help with something?"

"Actually I'd like to do one last check on your leg. I know you're planning on going out tonight and I'd prefer that you're complete healed before you do, not that it would stop you if you weren't."

Peter lifted his pant leg to show Bruce. There was hardly even a mark there, only a slightly pink color to show where new skin had covered. No doubt that wouldn't even be there in the morning. "As good as new. It didn't even hurt this morning for the training."

Bruce hummed. "All right then. You can go out but, be careful. I know it's been a few days but the agency that we got the information from will probably be looking for any sign of us, _you_ more likely. Agents actually saw you in the building."

"Don't worry Dr. Banner. I wasn't planning on doing anything strenuous." Peter said. "I've been keeping up with the news and the only real major thing that's going on is a string of robberies."

"I can't help but worry."

Peter smiled. "Thanks for that. I'll be careful and try not to get carried away with anything."

 **Jokes and references everywhere. Also to the person that asked about Ross, don't worry. You'll find out soon enough.**

 **Please point out any grammatical or spelling errors I missed so I might fix them in the future! Leave a review! It fulls the writer for another day!**

 **Hope ya liked it. See ya later!**


	6. Chapter 6

True to his word, Peter had tried to keep out of sight when he went out. Bruce's words didn't scare him but they did put him on edge. The whole world knew of Spider-Man and knew where he usually was, so it anyone wanted to actually get him all they would need to do was make some trouble in Queens and set a trap for him. Nothing out of the ordinary happened though and he did managed to string up the robbers that had been going around shops.

It was going on 1:30am when he returned to the compound; FRIDAY welcoming him back as he climbed through his window. She also informed him that Natasha and Clint had gotten back only an hour before he did. The sleep that was invading his mind was quickly dismissed as he took a quick shower and changed into his pajamas. He headed downstairs for his usual after midnight snack hoping to run into either of the spies to get any information they might have gotten. He heard a voice as he was rummaging through the fridge.

"Isn't it past your bedtime, _Underoos?_ " Clint teased.

"Come on. How do you even know about that?" Peter whined.

"FRIDAY announced it when you came back just now. Anything exciting happen while you were out?"

He rolled his eye and shrugged. "Nothing out of the ordinary; stopped a string of robberies that had been happening the past few days but other than that it was pretty calm. How about you two? Were you able to get anything?"

"We got something. We were gonna wait until morning to go over it with everyone. It's not much but it's definitely a step in the right direction." He stifled a yawn. "That means it's time to get some sleep." He began the trek to his room. "It's good to see ya kid."

"You too Mr. Barton. Have a good sleep." He waved to the man as he walked away. They got some info, that was good at least. A lot of times they would usually return empty handed because they got to the location too late and it had been moved or the informant would've died. He was a bit disappointed he didn't get anything at that moment but he could wait a few hours to find out. He grabbed a snack and a glass of water and headed back to his room.

The night seemed to go by in minutes, which was both a positive and negative. On the plus side, once everyone was up they'd begin going over the information Clint and Nat brought back. In the negative, Peter felt fatigued and sore all over. It crossed his mind that maybe it was because he hadn't gone out or really exercised in over a week but that wasn't the first time he'd been injured and had to take a break from Spider-Man. He didn't really fight anyone last night; sure a guy or two got a good hit on him but nothing that would affect him or even leave a bruise. Nonetheless he got up and changed before heading downstairs.

It was a bit saddening when he got downstairs and the smell of pancakes didn't hit his nose. His mind went to Deadpool and wondered where he went. The guy was weird that was no surprise but Peter couldn't help but have a strange sort of respect for him. He was tortured for crying out loud and disfigured as a result. Yet he still went out and took out bad guys, in a very loud and uncouth manner but took them out. He did want to help him in some way but figured since they were going after the same people basically, they'd meet up again at some point if they wanted to or not.

He helped himself to a few muffins and glass of juice as people started filing in. Barnes was first, followed by Thor then Bruce, who looked like he barely gone to sleep on the first place. It wasn't too long after that the others all joined, Tony being the only one to come up from the elevator meaning he'd been in the lab all night most likely going over what the two spies brought in. Hopefully he got at least a few hours of sleep.

They all helped themselves to whatever food they could find before Tony pulled up the information. Clint was right when he told Peter it wasn't much. It was practically the same from the first time but reworded. It did have a small list of chemicals, formulas, and names of people experimented on who seemed to have died.

When Peter mentioned Deadpool wasn't on the list and it sort of validated the story he told them, on top of the whole not dying after being shot in the head thing. That made the six other people recall the day and a half that was spent with him, explaining everything that happened to Nat and Clint. Needless to say, the two them found it hilarious and annoying and were glad to miss it.

Everyone pretty much went and did their own thing after that. Peter had gone to the lab with Tony and Bruce to see if they could work out the formulas and chemicals and hopefully find out what exactly they were doing to people. They needed to find the people who were associated with Weapon-X because they were by far the closest to recreating the super soldier serum, given they were still a very, very long way off, it was better safe than sorry.

After a few hours, Peter had finished with the formulas when he pushed the papers in front of him away and set his head on the table with a groan.

"What's up kid? Get stuck on something?" Tony asked while looking at holograms.

"No, I got them all done." He mumbled into the table. "I just feel really- out of it."

The two older men stopped working to look at him. "What do you mean?"

"I don't really know. I just feel off."

"FRIDAY, scan for his vitals."

"Do you think it's your senses acting up?" Bruce asked. "Have you noticed anything really different?"

Peter shook his head. "I can hear a lot more things than normal but I don't think it's sensory overload. I haven't really been able to sleep properly and haven't really been hungry the past few days

" _Scan complete."_ FRIDAY's voice rang. " _Underoos' heart rate is elevated and blood sugar is considerably low. If it gets any lower, I fear he will require serious medical attention. It also appears that he is sleep deprived. No other abnormalities detected."_

"Jesus kid. Are you trying to get yourself into a coma?" Tony said. "No wonder you feel _off._ "

"What's his blood sugar count at right now?" Bruce asked. When the AI responded with a 64, the men went white. "You're practically hypoglycemic right now! That's dangerous for none enhanced humans. I don't even know how you're still standing."

"Technically I'm sitting…" Peter said trying to relieve some of the tension in the room. "Are you ever gonna get FRIDAY to stop calling me that?"

"It's just one problem after another." Tony said with a shake of his head. "Go upstairs right now and get something to eat and then get to bed or something."

"But we just got all this information."

"You've helped more than enough right now." Bruce chided. "Pete please, for the sake of our sanity."

Peter lifted his head and slowly stood. "All right. I don't wanna pass out either. I'll go drink all the soda or something." He began heading to the elevator.

"You better _eat._ Don't make me make Thor feed you."

Peter merely waved as he went into the elevator. The scientists sighed as the door shut and it ascended.

"He always looks out for others before himself." Bruce shook his head eying Tony. " _Are_ you ever gonna change FRIDAY addressing him?"

Tony shrugged. "I'll give it another few days."

 **AVENGERS**

Peter found it strange as he sat at the kitchen island, downing soda after soda, that his blood sugar was so low and his heart beat was so fast. He didn't feel like that was what was wrong. If it was, his senses would've told him about it. He agreed that he was sleep deprived and that could be fixed with a few naps, blood sugar fix was in the process. Getting his heart rate down might be a little complicated because he didn't know why it was elevated in the first please.

"You know, most people drink whiskey to drown their sorrows, not name brand sodas." Clint said as he walked over. "What's up kid? The two dorks downstairs kick you out of their playpen?"

"Yes." Peter smiled at Clint's teasing. "But it's not the reason you think. Apparently my blood sugar's super low and I need to get it back up."

"What's it currently at?"

"Last time FRIDAY checked it was at 64."

Clint's eyes went wide. "Shit kid. You're lucky you didn't go into hypoglycemic shock and fall into a coma. Do you want me to make you something? Why didn't you say something?"

"Because it doesn't feel like that's what's wrong. I don't know what's happening but apparently my body doesn't want to cooperate with my brain right now." He groaned. "Head feels kinda fuzzy. I'm just gonna raid the pantry and drink more soda and take a nap or something."

He crossed his arms and eyes the kid. "Maybe puberty's finally hitting."

"Ha. Funny. You should do stand up." Peter flatly replied. He went to the pantry and started pulling out food. "I'm not planning on going anywhere so you can calm down. I'm just gonna be in my room." He walked away, arms full of food and drinks before Clint could reply.

After about an hour he started feeling nauseous. No matter what kind of powers he had, eating and drinking nothing but snacks and soda is bound to make anyone feel sick.

"FRIDAY can you tell me if I'm good?"

" _Please give me a moment to preform a scan."_

Peter opened a bottle of water. Though he felt nauseous, he did feel mildly better than he did before. Maybe it _was_ because he hadn't been eating that much. His hearing was still over the top though and he didn't have an explanation for that.

" _Your current blood sugar level is at an 85, which is a safe number in range for non enhanced human beings. You're still experiencing an elevated heart rate and sleep deprivation. I would suggest some calming music and a nap."_

"Thanks but I don't really wanna listen to anything right now." He took a drink of water and heard his phone buzz. He rolled his eyes, expecting it to be Tony asking him how he felt but was surprised when he saw a message from Ned. It had been forever since they last talked but the message that was sent made Peter's heart race even more.

" _Your heart rate has increased significantly. Boss will be informed of the change."_

Peter barely heard her as he looked at the message that was sent. It was a picture, maybe from the back of the school, Ned's smiling face was there and next to him was Deadpool giving a peace sign. The note below read _Just met your friend. He's a cool dude._ Whether it was actually from Ned or meant to be a threat, he didn't know. He closed out the message and immediately called. It went to voice mail. He called again but it still went to voice mail.

"Shit! Come on Ned! Pick up!" Still, it went to voice mail. He got up from the bed and got his backpack, shoving his suit in it and he went barreling out of his room, nearly hitting Tony on the way.

"Whoa, kid. You doing okay? FRIDAY said your heart rate spiked like you were in a panic." Tony said taking in the expression Peter's face. " _Are_ you in a panic?"

"Probably!" Peter very nearly shouted as he once again called Ned.

"Yeah that's a definite. What's wrong? We don't need you having a heart attack."

"I- I got this picture from Ned and it had him and- Ned! Are you all right!?"

" _Sorry, Ned can't come to the phone right now. He's a bit busy. If you'd like to leave a message I'll gladly relay it to him when I see him next."_

Peter nearly dropped the phone at hearing Deadpool's voice on the other end. "What did you do to Ned?"

" _Calm down Spidey. I didn't do anything to him. I just said I was your friend and he asked if we could take a picture."_

"Where is he? Let me talk to him." Peter demanded.

" _Hmmm, you see, that's the thing. I don't actually_ know _where he went, but if you wanna like come to the school, maybe bring a picnic, we can talk more in depth about it."_ There were sirens in the background. _"Oooh, that's for me. Okay little spidey. Remember to come alone or else. I gotta run. See you at the school."_

"You sonofabitch. Where is-" The line went dead. "Shit."

"Heyheyhey, Pete, what's wrong?" Tony stopped him from shoving past.

Peter took a breath and showed Tony the picture. "I was just sent this and when I tried to call Ned, that idiot picked up and said he doesn't know where Ned is. He- he said to meet him at the school. Mr. Stark I _need_ to go see if Ned's alright."

"Okay calm down before you give yourself an aneurysm or heart attack." Tony said. "You're in no shape to be going anywhere. You look like you're about to hyperventilate."

"Mr. Stark-"

" _So_ give me five minutes. I'm not going to let you go out when you could pass out any minute and I'm certainly not letting you meet that idiot alone."

Peter's eyes lit up. "Thank you Mr. Stark."

 **AVENGERS**

They'd never gotten to the school that fast. Peter called Ned's phone again but it went right back to voice mail but seeing as his hearing was going overboard, he heard Ned's ringtone and it was coming from the roof.

"Okay he's up on the roof." Peter said as he began to exit the car.

"Seven minutes." Tony said. "You get seven minutes before I get up there and deal with it myself."

Peter nodded. He grabbed his backpack. He opted to just running through the school instead of climbing the walls like he originally planned. Given school was out for the day, there would be people doing after school activities, he didn't want to chance someone seeing him and making a big fuss about it. He ran through the halls ignoring the few people he passed and popped out on the roof.

It was void of anything except for a phone laying a few feet from the door. Upon closer inspection he realized it was Ned's. Peter's heart started pounding again. If Ned was injured because of him, he didn't know what he would do with himself. With all the horrible things flooding into his head, he didn't register the footsteps he heard as being right behind him and he barely heard his attacker address him.

"Sorry Petey. No hard feelings."

It was then that a blunt object hit him on the back of his head, and he blacked out.

 **You know how I said there'd be no regular update schedule? Yeah I think I'm a liar on that. But we're getting closer to the end so I hope everyone's been having fun so far.**

 **Please point out and spelling or grammatical errors I might have missed so I can fix them in the future. Leave a review! It's like a writer's water! They _must_ have it to live!**

 **Hope ya liked it. See ya later!**


	7. Chapter 7

He knew it was a bad idea. Tony _knew_ it was a bad idea to let Peter venture to the roof himself. Those seven long minutes were agonizing but he waited. If Deadpool _did_ have Ned, he didn't want to risk being there and getting him hurt. He enjoyed Ned in the few times they'd met. He was like Peter's opposite; while Peter was more hardware savvy, Ned was software savvy and helped design a few codes which Tony was in the process of using.

Once the seventh minute hit, Tony was out of the car and going to the roof. He ignored the people who stopped to stare at him as he walked and went straight to the roof. A string of swears left his mouth when all he found was Peter's backpack, still containing is suit, and two phones. He picked both of them up and opened them to get any sort of information. When he opened Peter's it automatically went to his pictures with a video. He wasn't pleased in the least when he hit play.

" _Helloooooo. If I'm right then this is probably Iron dude and if it's not, then please turn this phone into the Avengers immediately and don't you dare finish watching this video."_ Deadpool's voice carried. _"If this is indeed Iron dude, how you doing? Long time no talk. Look I know you're probably pissed about the whole_ I took Spidey _thing but I need to borrow him for a little while. I'll bring him back in one piece I promise. Don't wait up for us and don't try to follow or you're gonna ruin everything and I reaaaaally don't need that. Oh also if you could give back the other kid's phone. I feel bad about taking it from him. He said I was cool."_ The video cut off after that.

Tony was absolutely livid. _Don't try to follow._ Who the hell did he think he was? He could track Peter through his-

No. He couldn't. Peter didn't have his suit or his phone. He had nothing with him that Tony would be able to track. He had nothing to go on and had no idea where the two of them went.

 **AVENGERS**

"I knew I should've put a tracker in his watch or something." Tony sighed. He was currently hacked into the city's security camera mainframe running facial recognition to find any trace of Peter.

"You can't blame yourself for this Stark." Steve said. "No one could've guessed this would happen."

"We could've and we should've. It was a- a stupid trick that gets used in movies all the time. We should've seen right through it."

"We're all worried Tony." Bruce pointed out. "Pete's a strong kid. He can bust himself out of situations like this."

"It's been nine hours already and the kid doesn't have anything with him, not even his web shooters. We've no sign of him, no trace of anything. Nat and Barton haven't even been able to find anything. Hell not even Barnes has found anything."

"Has there been any contact from his friend about all of this?" Thor asked.

Tony sighed. "No. All he said when I met with him to give his phone back was that Wilson caught him on the way to decathlon practice, said he was Peter's friend and asked for a picture. He realized his phone was gone when he got home. He hasn't had contact from either of them."

The group was silent and at a loss. They had zero leads to go on. It was like Peter dropped from the face of the earth.

"Wait." Thor said as he stood from where he was sitting, drawing everyone's attention. "Look." He pointed at a man in one of the cameras.

"Yes, that man obviously has some sort of disfiguration. No need to stare Sparky." Tony huffed.

"No, he looked directly at the camera. Same in this one; he's looking directly into the street camera."

"What are you getting at?"

He was silent for a moment. "I do not want to put false hope nor do I want to seem hasty but didn't Deadpool say the experiments done on his body leave him disfigured?"

Bruce snorted and shook his head. "He did but that's- that's a _real_ long shot to go off of. That could just be some random guy."

"I have not seen one other person look into the cameras like he does and Deadpool _knows_ we're going to be looking for him."

"FRIDAY do a facial scan for him." Tony said. It could be nothing but it could be the small bit of a clue they needed. The AI proceeded to put of five other occurrences of the mystery man walking down the streets of New York, staring into security cameras he passed. "Search for him in the data base."

FRIDAY brought up six pictures of men with possible matches; five relatively old men and one younger one with the greatest match at 84% and the lowest at 43%. Three older men were labeled as dead, one was in jail on account of vehicular man slaughter, and the last was alive and living somewhere in Wyoming. The younger man was labeled as unknown, but it was his name that made everyone on edge: Wade Winston Wilson. His match was only 67% and looked nothing like the man in the surveillance video.

"Give is some info on this guy FRIDAY."

" _There is not much information to give on him."_ FRIDAY said. _"He was born in Canada and has dual citizenship with the United States. He is presumed dead by all and any family but no official statement can be found. Though the facial recognition is not a perfect match, the recognition of the eyes is of 100%."_

"That's good enough for me." Bruce said. "Where's this footage from?"

" _It is from various streets in the Port Washington location."_

"That's not far at all. It wouldn't even take thirty minutes from Queens." Steve said.

"FRIDAY send this to the others and tell them we'll meet them down there somewhere." Tony commanded. "Keep your scan going for any sign of him and alert us if he suddenly shows up in a different area."

" _Yes boss."_

 **AVENGERS**

Peter was not having a good time. He said it to himself earlier: a good way to get himself captured was to set a trap in his area. He jinxed himself big time. He was currently in chains, his feet and wrists bound, hanging from a hook in an old warehouse somewhere near the bay. He'd been hanging there for hours. His head hurt but he didn't have a concussion at least so that was a plus.

"Honey I'm hoooooome." Wade's voice echoed through the warehouse. "And I brought tacos." Peter sent him a flat glare. "Come on, you're not still mad are you? I said I was sorry about it."

"You knocked me out and kidnapped me."

"Thank god he doesn't know about the drugging." Wade whispered under his breath.

"You _drugged_ me too!? What the hell is wrong with you!? When did you even do that?"

"Aw shit, forgot about the super hearing. Okay look, I know this seems really bad, like _really_ bad but I need you to trust me-"

"Hell no!"

"-when I say the end of this will benefit both of us, probably you more than me but it's a price I'm willing to pay for love." Peter rolled his eyes. "The weird thing your feeling right now is from me drugging you, first night; honestly I don't know what I really used but you're still alive so that's like a _huge_ plus on my part."

"I don't know why I wanted to help you." Peter sighed.

"Can we not do the interrupty thingy? I need to do the whole shpeel that makes me seem like a bad guy before the real bad guys come." The boy rolled his eyes. "So a few weeks ago I bust into this base in DC. Dudes were _not_ happy to see me at all. I try to say all I need is a little info but they ain't having any of it. Shit goes down, I end of getting captured for a bit. Few days go by until I get called to meet with the big man. _Complete_ asshole let me tell you, face not even a mother could love. Says he has a job for me and if I agree to do it then I get the information I want which will supposedly lead me to more of the bastards that did this to me." He gestured to his unmasked face. "Course I don't trust the guy but I don't really got nothing to lose so I say why not. Turns out the job was to get you.

"My heart starts going because like _whoa, I finally get to meet my prince_ but also like _whoa bro, you're gonna do some raunty shit if you get him_ because any government bastard really can't be trusted. Anyway, I get let loose on the unsuspecting world again and begin my travel all the way here. Can you believe they didn't even give me a lift here? I had to hoof it and hitchhike all the way. You would think with all the money we spend on the government they'd be able to give little Wadey a trip to New York but nooooo. I'm almost to where you were and I suddenly pass this big old government buildings and think I might as well bust the place, might have what I need and low and behold, there you were. Big old coincidence that we met in that place. Wow that was a long monologue. When do I ever monologue?"

Peter hung there, an eyebrow raised in disbelief.

"But okay, long story short, you're here to be picked up by big boss and swept away to wherever they're gonna take you. You can talk now. Just in case you thought I was still monologuing, I'm pretty much done." Wade said, shoving a taco into his mouth.

"So- everything else you said was a lie then?"

"Dude! No! I would _never_ lie to you. Well, maybe on _some_ occasions but I swear to you, all the other things I told you are true and I really, _really_ need you to trust me on this, at least for a few more hours. After that you're free to hate me all you want. Actually I'd prefer it if you didn't hate me otherwise I will wait two years for nothing."

Peter smirked and shook his head going against his better judgement. "Fine. Not like I have any choice in the matter."

"Come to think of it, why haven't you broken out of here?"

" _You drugged me_. I've been like this for two days."

"Huh. Didn't think it was _that_ bad. Then again the author probably doesn't know anything about drugs and meds and just needs a way to keep you here until big bad boss man shows up to further the plot."

Peter rolled his eyes at the man's words. "How long until whoever gets here?"

"Well considering we've been talking for about maybe three minutes but movies and stories always make it seem like it's been hours and a lot of people like dramatic and stupidly well timed interruptions, I'm gonna say right aboooooout-"

"Well done Mr. Wilson." A voice echoed through the warehouse.

"See? _Perfectly_ timed entrance. I probably could've said that two chapters ago and he would've shown up." Wade showed another taco in his mouth.

Peter watched as several men walked towards them. Most in tactical gear, one in a military outfit.

"Though I must say I'm in a state of mind to have you shot." The military man said. "I tell you that you'll be rewarded with the information you seek after you're mission is done and yet you seem to have destroyed one of our operating facilities and stolen the information nonetheless."

"Aw come on Thaddy, just a little fun and games. I'm sure no one was brutally injured. Besides, you couldn't kill me if you wanted to. If you could, _I_ woulda offed myself _ages_ ago."

"Dozens of officers were killed when you decided to blow up my compound." He looked past Wade to the boy that was hanging behind him. "But I'm willing to look past that seeing as you have what was asked."

"Yeah yeah cool. Can I have the files now?" The man gestures for a soldier to hand him something. "Niiiiice. Gimmegimmegimmegimme-"

The man passed Wade and went to Peter. "Well well Mr. Parker. We finally get to meet face to face. You've caused me so much trouble in the past. I'm glad we can finally discuss our- disagreements."

Peter's face mirrored confusion. He'd never seen that man before, nor did he recognize his voice.

"Uuh Thaddy, not introducing yourself to others is rude." Wade pipped up. "What did I tell you when _we_ first met?"

"Ah, you're quite right Mr. Wilson. How distasteful of me." He walked closer to Peter, making the boy try to shift away.

"Greetings Spider-Man. My name is General Thaddeus Ross."

Thaddeus Ross.

That name seemed like something taboo. He has heard people in the compound mention him in, putting it lightly, an unkind manner. It took a second to put two and two together but Peter did know the man, by name at least. He was the one responsible for making Dr. Banner how he his _and_ he approves the accords meaning he was the one to cause the rift between everyone in the first place.

Wade was right. He was a huge asshole.

"Mr. Parker," he began. "Do you know exactly how much trouble you've caused me?"

"Not enough to care." Peter mumbled.

Ross stepped towards Peter making it so they were mere inches apart. "Mr. Parker, it would be in your best interest if you cooperated. It would make both our lives incredibly simple. Now I'm going to ask you a series of questions and you're going to give me answers."

"You'd like that wouldn't you?" He knew he shouldn't be pushing Ross but the moment he realized who the man was, an immense hatred grew almost instantly.

Wade snorted. " _Woooow,_ someone's feeling sassy today."

Ross looked Peter in the eyes and smirked. He back up and started walking around him. "Mr. Parker, how old are you?"

"Shouldn't you know? You have files on everyone."

"Stark and the rest of them have done a fair job of keeping you out of our range. I regret to say we have nearly no information on you what so ever. In all honesty, we didn't even know you existed until Stark brought you to Germany. In short, you could blame him for all of this."

Peter scoffed. "Yeah, sure."

"When did Stark give you your powers Mr. Parker?"

There was a silence before Peter started laughing. "You- you honestly think Mr. Stark gave me my powers? _You_ guys are the ones running human experiments, not him."

"Then _where_ did you get it?" Ross bit out, now standing in front of Peter. Neither of them noticed Wade's sudden lack of interest at the files. "Mr. Parker I don't believe you know how valuable you are. You are- the next best thing besides Rogers. Whatever serum was used for you is practically perfect. Now I'm going to ask you again, _when did Stark give you your powers?"_

Peter was fuming. How _dare_ Ross accuse Tony of human experimentation. He barely got to go to the lab without someone else there. Tony would never, _ever_ do something to hurt him.

" _He. Didn't."_

Ross's has shot out and seized Peter's throat. "Then tell me how!"

Peter acted on instinct. His legs went up and kicked out, getting Ross in the stomach and sending him a couple feet back. The soldiers trained their guns on Peter while one helped Ross to his feet.

Ross gave a labored huff and turned to Wade. "You told me you would restrain him."

"And I diiiiid." Wade complained. "Do you not see how restrained he is? I mean he's got shittons of drugs going through his system. Not my fault he's got a fast metabolism. Besides I think you deserved that; kiiiiiinda acting like a huge dickwad right now."

"I now see why they call you The Merc with a Mouth Mr. Wilson." Ross said while adjusting himself. He turned back to Peter. "All right Mr. Parker. Since you will not give me the answers I desire, I will just have to take them from you." He gestured for his men. "Hopefully you will decide to change your mind upon arriving."

"Arriving?"

"Yes Mr. Parker. You will be coming with us to a base of operations where we will extract your DNA so we may figure out exactly what serum was used on you, and hopefully recreate it in the process."

Peter went white.

"Heyheyheyheyhey- no. This isn't what you said you'd do." Wade said as he stood.

"Your job here is done Mr. Wilson. You may take your leave."

He stood in front of Peter. "All you said was to bring him for questioning. You never said anything about taking him so you could experiment on him. That shit just doesn't fly with me."

"Get out of my way Mr. Wilson."

"I'm gonna go ahead and say no. Oh and also fuck you." Wade pulled out a katana and flung it back, effectively severing the chain that was holding Peter. Once the boy dropped to the floor, he cut the chain around his feet.

"Mr. Wilson-"

"Ah uh. We just did everything you instructed. I brought the kid and you asked your questions. That was it. Now I'm gonna do what's right and give him back to Irondude, like I promised."

Ross was furious as Wade's display. "He is government property."

" _Property?_ Ho-ly shit. Really? You're a bigger cockbag than I thought." He glanced at Peter. "Petey, how fast do you think you can run?"

" _Don't you dare._ " The soldiers took aim.

Wade smiled at Peter. "Run."

 **Welllllllll. Here comes that classic Deadpool that we all love.**

 **Please point out any spelling or grammatical errors I might have missed so I may fix them in the future! Leave a review! It's like it's the salt and the writer is the goat; we crave the mineral!**

 **Only one more chapter left. Hope you're all ready for it.**

 **Hope ya liked it. See ya later!**


	8. Chapter 8

Tony had been getting more and more frustrated. The team had scattered themselves throughout the Port Washington area, going to every dark and dingy place they could possibly think of. Nat and Clint had been walking the streets where Wade had been seen and then some. Tony had been flying around in his suit. They found no trace of either of them anywhere. Bruce, Thor, Steve, and Barnes had been hovering over the arena in the Quitjet in stealth mode; all having eyes and ears on different things: security cameras, listening to police scanners from surrounding counties, several different drone cameras, and even a special inferred camera that picked up heat signatures of enhanced individuals.

There was nothing on any of them.

"Maybe we were wrong about this." Bruce sullenly said. "It we've been looking for two hours and we've got nothing to show for it."

"Are you suggesting we stop?" Steve asked, not liking the words coming from his mouth.

"Of course not, but maybe taking a break and regrouping to go over the information we do have would be more beneficial to finding Pete than going over the same six miles and coming up empty."

He was right. Tony didn't want to say it but Bruce had a very good point. Two hours over the same area with nothing to show was pathetic at best. They were the Avengers for gods sake. They could take down villains and alien hordes but couldn't find a sixteen year old kid.

" _It hasn't crossed anyone's mind that this was most likely misdirection, has it?"_ Natasha's voice rang through everyone's comms.

No. It did not.

They all had such tunnel vision that they didn't even think to expand their search.

"FRIDAY increase the range of everything by twenty-five miles." Tony commanded. Dozens of more holoscreens popped up.

" _I am detecting a government issue airship in Northport."_ The AI rang out. _"There is also a report of shots fired in a warehouse by the bay followed by a high speed pursuit on the 495 involving a standard government vehicle and a blue sedan heading southwest, coming in our direction. There has also been several more sightings of Mr. Wilson on security cameras in the Greenlawn and Northport area."_

"Sonofabitch." Tony breathed out. "Can you get us any coverage of the area?"

" _No sir. It appears that there is no news coverage of the incident at all."_

" _Like some big government ass doesn't want this to be public incident."_ Clint noted.

"We'll head that way. No doubt it has something to do with us." Barnes said.

Tony started flying northeast. Nat and Clint would be taking a car to see if they could intercept the cars coming in their direction and the Quinjet rose higher into the air and began to scan the open airspace to see if they could get a lock on the other ship FRIDAY had detected. After about ten minutes FRIDAYS voice rang through Tony's helmet.

" _Incoming call. It's from an unknown number."_

There were very few people who would know his number. "Answer it."

" _Mr. Stark!?"_ There was that voice that had been missing for the past thirteen hours.

"Peter! Jesus kid where've you been?" Tony couldn't hold back the relief in his tone.

" _It's a long story!"_ Tony could hear an engine roaring in the background along with the pings of metal on metal and breaking glass. _"Shit!"_

"What's happening kid?"

" _We're on the freeway currently- currently in a very high speed chase with some very,_ very, _angry military people with lots of guns. I didn't even know- ow! Goddamn don't slam me into the side of the door."_

" _I can heal from a bullet to the head, you can't! Get your head down and put your fucking seatbelt on! Safety first!"_ Wade shouted loud enough to be heard.

"FRIDAY trace his cell signal and send everyone the coordinates now." Tony ordered. "You still there Pete?"

" _Yeah but I don't know how much longer this car is gonna last. We're going top speed but- oh shit."_ A rather loud and large explosion was heard.

"Kid!"

" _They have a helicopter firing a bazooka at us."_ Peter basically squeaked.

" _Hey fuck you Ross! You said you needed him alive!"_ Wade's muffles voice said.

Did he hear that right? Ross? As in _Ross_ Ross?

" _Yeah Mr. Stark. That Ross._ " Tony hadn't realized he asked it allowed. _"He thinks you used a super soldier serum to give me m-"_

" _BAIL!"_

The line went dead after a secondary sound of an explosion.

"Shit! Everyone got the coordinates?"

"It'll take us five minutes to get there." Bruce said.

" _We'll be following."_ Nat added.

"FRIDAY divert all extra power to thrusters."

" _Yes sir."_

Tony went zooming through the sky towards the coordinates. He hoped they would find Peter alive and well and not lying dead on the street or in Ross' hands.

 **AVENGERS**

" _Run."_

There was something in Wade's tone that was somewhat playful in a sort of weird way. Nonetheless he hoisted himself up and ran to an opening of the warehouse.

"After him." Ross called out. The soldiers tried to follow but were stopped by Wade.

"Do you guys wanna learn how to count? I have a real fun way to teach you. Well not fun for you but it's real fun for me. Want me to show you?"

"Kill him." The soldiers took aim.

"Oh Thaddy, don't make promises you can't keep. Let's start!" He took aim and shot a soldier in the head. "One!"

Peter shuttered outside the building as he head shots ring out. What he would give to be able to turn his hearing off. He rounded a corner trying to get his baring and check out his surroundings but literally bumped into a soldier. Before he had a chance to react, Peter bolted in the other direction. He wished he had been in the right mind to actually put his suit on before the whole thing happened, hell, his web shooters at least. It's not like people _didn't_ know who he was anymore. He also hoped his senses would go back to normal. He didn't even sense the soldier for gods sake.

He ducked behind a few crates near the building and waited. The gunshots from inside had stopped and it sounded like some were outside. After a few minutes it went silent again.

"Okay! Let's go!"

Peter nearly jumped out of his skin at Wade's voice. "You gave me a heart- oh my god. Are you- all right?"

Wade's suit was riddled with bullet holes and slightly darker patches of red. He held up his hand which was missing his middle finger. "They shot off my favorite fucking finger! Figuratively _and_ literally!"

"Can we _not_ put those images in my brain?"

"You're gonna have to learn about it at some point. You should see the fan art. Like _whooooooa_ are those people creative and _nasty_." He laughed. "So what's your plan?"

" _M-my_ plan!?" Peter stuttered. " _You're_ the one that got _me_ into this mess in the first place!"

"Ooooh yeah." He pulled out his phone. "I don't think it would be very nice to get Dopinder involved in this. Soooo let's just hot wire a car."

Peter sighed in defeat as he and Wade quietly made their way to a parking lot. "Do you even know how to hot wire a car? It's not like in the movies."

"Yeah but the readers don't know that." He winked. "Let's just get a good shot of the window breaking, then I'll go ahead and open up the bottom thingy right here- let's cut these two wires because why the hell not then we just put them together aaaand-" the car roared to life.

"Did- did you just montage yourself hot wiring a car?"

"You get to do a lot of things when you have no boundaries Petey. Now hop in. I doubt those were all the men Thaddy had in store for us." Peter was barely in the car before Wade drove off. It only took about a minute for a military vehicle to start after them and a helicopter following from the air. "I hope this isn't going to be like one of those Fast movies. I mean I love The Rock as much as anyone but _come on_ , _nine_ movies?"

"Where are we going?" Peter asked as they zoomed through traffic. "Where were we at in the first place?"

"We're in Northport."

"Why the _hell_ are we in Northport?"

"Thaddy wanted to meet somewhere that wasn't close to any Avenger best or whatever. It's not like _I_ chose where to meet. I woulda just preferred a sandwich shop somewhere." Wade answered as he swerved.

"I hope this car has enough power to-" the rear window shattered. "They're _shooting_ at us!"

"Ah fuckberries." He took out his phone and tossed it to Peter. "I know you know Irondad's number so nows a good time to call him."

Of course Peter knew Tony's number. Tony had made him memorize it after he got kidnapped as Peter Parker and needed help. It rang only once before it went through. "Mr. Stark!?"

" _Peter! Jesus kid where've you been?"_

"It's a long story!" Peter looked to the car tailing them and saw two men firing at the car. He ducked down as his side window was shattered. "Shit!"

" _What's happening kid?"_

"We're on the freeway currently- currently in a very high speed chase with some very, very, angry military people with lots of guns. I didn't even know- ow! Goddamn don't slam me into the side of the door." Peter was currently hunched over and being pushed sideways by one of Wade's legs.

"I can heal from a bullet to the head, you can't! Get your head down and put your fucking seatbelt on! Safety first!" Wade shouted in response.

" _FRIDAY trace his cell signal and send everyone the coordinates now."_ He heard Tony order. _"You still there Pete?"_

"Yeah but I don't know how much longer this car is gonna last. We're going top speed but- oh shit." He looked back to see a man halfway hanging from the helicopter with a rocket launcher, wasting no time in firing it at them.

" _Kid!"_

"They have a helicopter firing a bazooka at us!" Peter squeaked.

"Hey fuck you Ross! You said you needed him alive!" Wade yelled out his broken window.

" _Ross? As in_ Ross _Ross?"_

"Yeah Mr. Stark. That Ross. He thinks you used a super soldier serum to give me m-"

"BAIL!"

Peter was cut off as Wade shouted and somehow managed to tackle him from the car onto the freeway. The car went another couple hundred feet before it had gotten blow up from a secondary rocket launched from the front of them. They rolled for a bit until they crashed into the center median.

"HA. Man, _just_ like in the movies." Wade laughed. "You can't say you don't find this a tiiiiiiny bit entertaining Petey." He looked towards the boy only to get a groan in response. He moved to check the damages to find a piece of shrapnel embedded in Peter's side. "Aw fuck, it _is_ just like in the movies. Can't end the story without just _ooooone_ more potentially life threatening injury. _God_ people are so uncreative these days."

"Mr. Wilson." Ross' voice carried over the helicopter as it landed and he got out. "I think you'll find that boy belongs to me."

"Well _actually_ he belongs to Stan Lee and Marvel Comics." He stood up, unsheathing his katanas. "How about it Thaddy? Want to count again, this time slice edition?"

"You're going to be in so many pieces, they're going to have to grow back bits of you."

"Oooh, _so_ not cool. You didn't even say the line right." He shook his head. "Oh well; might as well start with this guy over here." He took off towards the man on the ground with the rocket launcher. The other soldiers followed after him.

Ross took the opportunity and approached Peter. He looked down on him with a smirk. "This all could have been avoided if you'd given me answers Mr. Parker."

"Screw- you." Peter bit out as he got into a standing position, holding his bleeding side as best he could.

"It seems you've been Mr. Wilson too long. His foul mouth seems to have rubbed off on you."

"Why do you- want the serum any way? We don't need more super soldiers."

Ross laughed. "Not super soldiers, Mr. Parker. Super Slaves; the perfect fighting machines at our fingertips. No other country would dare even think of attacking us."

Peter was taken aback. He was planning on doing the same thing that happened to Sargent Barnes to an unknown number of people. "You're insane."

"No Mr. Parker, I am a military man and I will do whatever it takes to keep this country safe. That was the point of the Accords but seeing as _you_ personally screwed that up, I've been given no choice but to go with an alternative option." He pulled out a gun. "I'm going to ask you this one last time, where is your super soldier serum?"

Peter shook his head and couldn't help but smile at the whole thing. It was petty and idiotic. Through the screaming and gunshots he heard what sounded like a jet engine. "I have a question for you." He looked at Ross with a shiteating grin. "How do you feel about asking the first super soldier himself?"

Ross frowned and followed Peter's eyes, turning to see the Quinjet just coming into view. He turned back to the boy absolutely fuming.

There was that familiar tingle ping up his neck. He quickly ducked and vaulted over the center median to avoid being shot by the very angry government official. The movement sent white hot pain surging through his body. He botched the landing and ended up pushing the shrapnel in his side further in. He laid on the ground, groaning and clutching his side.

Ross climbed over the median and took aim at Peter once again. "I don't need you living to get your serum."

A shot rang out- and the sound of a ricochet. Peter hadn't even registered the noise of additional thrusters and was a bit surprised to see that Tony had dropped between them clad in his Ironman armor, hand raised and ready to fire at Ross.

"Well isn't this a strange twist of events." Tony's voice echoed through his helmet. "Looking for one kidnapping asshat and end up finding another." He spared a glance at the boy behind him. "How you doing kid?"

Peter was laying flat on his back. He lifted a bloody hand and gave a shaky thumbs up. "Peachy… kinda real hungry, probably could go for a few burgers."

"I think you deserve that after what you've been through."

 _"Hey, I'm invited too right?"_ Deadpool called out. _"I helped us not get blown up!"_

"So Ross, you want to try to explain your way out of this? Explain exactly _why_ you first attempted a kidnapping and are now currently trying to eliminate a member of our team?" Tony said completely ignoring the red idiot behind them.

"He is the government's property. If he has to die then so be it." Ross bit out. "You decided that when you signed the Accords and brought him to Germany."

" _He_ never signed the Accords. They were revised anyways to actually include him and respect his privacy because he's underage. You're the one that fucked everything over when you revealed his identity to the media."

"Perhaps none of this would have happened if you didn't actually give him the serum. To think you're actually that stupid and irresponsible to bring a _child_ into this brutal world."

Tony's brow knitted. While Ross was correct that he brought Peter into the whole of it, he had absolutely no idea how Peter actually got his powers which had meant everyone did a good job of keeping him a secret for the most part. How Ross actually found out Peter was Spider-Man was still a mystery though but he mostly chalked it up to dumb luck.

"You're more of an idiot than I thought if you really I gave him his powers." Tony laughed. The Quinjet had landed and the others had started filing out. Natasha and Clint had also arrived. They had gotten from the car and moved between the boy laying on the ground and the subsiding battle between Deadpool and the soldiers, purely a precaution.

"How you doing Pete?" Bruce asked as he and Barnes approached the boy while Steve and Thor went to Tony.

"I don't think I lost _too_ much blood." He joked. "You know how- how when you sit on a chair- and you spin on it for a long time and you- you can't stand straight after and you kinda wanna puke? Kinda feels like that. And apparently the red guy drugged me at some point but I think it's wearing off."

Bruce nodded, not happy in the least. "Okay. At least you're conscious and aren't incoherent. That's a major plus." He gently starting looking at the piece of metal embedded in his side. "How about this? How does this feel, all things considering."

Peter silenced a hiss and smirked. "I'll give you two- guesses."

Barnes rolled his eyes. "Glad to see you can still joke in a time of crisis."

"Think you can stand long enough to get into the jet or do you need Barnes to carry you like a princess?"

"I think it's time I started get- getting treated like the royalty I am." The two older men let smiles slip onto their faces.

"What's it gonna be Ross? You gonna come quietly or do we need to throw you over our shoulder like a child?" Steve said, crossing his arms.

"You have _no_ right trying to order me around Rogers." Ross spat.

" _You_ have no right trying to kill the young." Thor shot back. "Those in a position of power should be helping the weak and young, not trying to mindlessly slaughter them!"

"They're expendable." He blatantly stated. "Most of them aren't strong enough to survive the tests. Mr. Parker there will most likely be the key to fixing that."

"And you're prepared to kill him." Tony stated.

"You must make sacrifices for progress."

Tony lowered his arm. "Okay. I think that's good enough. What do you think Cap? Sparky?"

"I think you coulda held out for more." Steve said.

"Am I correct in assume you also had some sort of camera recording this whole interaction?" Thor smirked at the confused man in front of the three of them.

" _Oooooh he did the stupid villain thing!_ " The group heard Deadpool yell. _"What an idiot!"_

Tony glanced behind himself and when he saw that the area was vacant and Peter was safe inside the Quinjet, he pulled up a video of the last five minutes. Ross' eyes went wide. Tony had been recording their entire encounter.

"I'm pretty sure this is substantial evidence that will hold up in any court." Ross held his gun up to Tony's exposed face only to have it knocked to the ground by an arrow. "Wanna add more Rossy? The mere fact that you broke the accords is enough to put you away. Everything else is just icing on the cake."

" _Good job idiot! Ya played yourself!"_

Ross stood there fuming. His mouth was open ever so slightly as he stood there in an angered silence. He had been backed into a corner with no way out.

"Okay this has been a _riveting_ experience but I think it's time for us to go." Tony said. "Don't call us, we'll call you and, uh, you can keep the red idiot." The three of them along with Natasha and Clint made their way to the Quinjet. After a moment, the bay door was shut and it took off.

"They _actually_ left me." Deadpool said. "I can't believe they actually left me. After all I did for them, I don't even get a thank you. The _nerve_ of people these days." He went to the car Natasha and Clint had abandoned. "Nope. Won't end like this." He started the engine and drove past Ross. "I'll leave clean up to you Thaddy!"

 **AVENGERS**

It had been one week since the incident on the freeway. Peter had been taking it easy and been mainly camping out on one of the couches, playing video games with Clint and Barnes most of the days. Bruce had taken out the shrapnel to find it had nicked Peter's intestine and warranted surgery. It wasn't too bad but it lead to having only to consume liquids for a few days while it healed. Not to mention the various scrapes and bruises that littered his body.

Steve, Tony, and Natasha had headed to DC as soon as Peter had woken from his surgery. Tony had made several copies of the video he took of Ross and sent it to several large government heads, even the president. The meeting would be held a few days after. No one had heard anything of Ross since they left him on the freeway.

Peter had been healing nicely. After the fourth day he started walking to get his own food and snacks from the kitchen but that was really all he could manage with the blood he had lost and internal bleeding without feeling short of breath or dizzy. When the week had passed, he had been well enough to venture around the compound a bit and began sleeping in his room again, being able to actually go up and down the stairs himself was the main reason he stayed in on the couch.

Steve had contacted them while still in DC and told them all that they would need to meet them for a trial to testify against Ross, though Peter could remain in the compound seeing as he was still recovering and the travel would be most likely non beneficial to his health.

"I'll be fine. It's not like I'm going to go out. I can barely bend over without hurting still. _Go._ Make sure that asshole gets put behind bars or something. FRIDAY's got my back."

In the first few hours they all reluctantly left, Peter kind of regretted telling them all to go. He wished someone had stayed because he was excessively bored and sore. Bruce had given him special medication that would stay in his body longer than normal but it wasn't helping much. Once it became too much to, he went to his room to nap.

" _Mr. Parker._ " FRIDAY's voice pulled him from his sleep.

He groaned, though happy Tony had finally changed the voice command back to normal. "How long have I been asleep?"

" _Approximately six hours and twenty-three minutes. Mr. Parker I have woken you to inform you that there is someone currently trying to enter the compound through the living quarter's window."_

Peter was up in a second. "What?! Don't you think that's something to sound the alarm over?"

" _Of course but he asked me to inform you he is here and asks your permission to enter. He is currently waiting on the veranda."_

" _Who_ FRIDAY?"

" _Mr. Wilson."_ Of course. Of course he would appear right as the others had left and he was left alone and not in a good position to fight. " _Would you like me to alert Mr. Stark and the others?"_

"No." He huffed. "I'll see what he wants and get rid of him." He lazily got out of bed and went downstairs to see Wade waving at him and pointing at the lock on the door. He unlocked it and let the man in. "What are you doing here?"

"Hello to you too Spidey. I've been fine thank you. How have you been?" Wade sarcastically said. Peter gave him a flat stare. "Okay believe it or not, I'm only here for my phone."

"Your- phone?"

"Uuuh yeah. Remember, the one I let you use to call Irondad before we bailed from the car while people were shooting at us? Kiiiinda need it back."

Peter blinked at him. He didn't even know if he still had it. "Yeah, course." He headed back to his room to check, Wade trailing behind. He looked through a bag of his tarnished clothes that were getting ready to be fixed and sure enough he found a phone, a bit of blood coating and a broken screen. "Sorry about the screen. I can get you a new one if-"

"Nope. It's good." Wade took the phone and shoved it in his pocket. "Okay that's all. Thanks Spidey. I'll see you in two years." He exited the room leaving Peter a bit dumbfounded.

"Wait! That's really all you came for?" Peter followed him into the living area and watched him go to the veranda.

"Yup." He turned to Peter and wiggled his eyebrows. "I mean unless there's something _you_ wanted to do."

"Nope." He stated flatly. Wade shrugged and began climbing down the side of the building. Peter closed and locked the veranda doors and stood there for a second. "FRIDAY what just happened?"

" _I have a recording of it if you would like to watch it to gain information you might be lacking."_

Peter shook his head and went back to his room and fell back asleep.

Everyone arrived back at the compound two days later. The trial had gone smoothly. Nearly everyone who had attended had agreed that Ross be terminated from his place in the government and put under some sort of lock and key. The evidence that was there was beautifully horrible; stacks upon stacks of research from labs Ross had control over where nearly all were reports on patients with a large red FAILED stamp going across it. Adding the video Tony had gotten and the additional information they received from the compounds, it was more than enough to put Ross away for good.

Peter told everyone how Wade had come by to get his phone and how really weird and kind of awkward it was. They were all highly suspicious but after watching the video FRIDAY had their nerves calmed.

A few months had passed since the whole thing and everything had gone back to normal, at least as normal as it could get around there. Peter had donned his spider garb and started patrolling again, doing missions every now and again. Peter was sitting at the table going over some research from a project he was working on when his phone buzzed.

He opened it up and nearly passed out. His voice rang through the compound as he jumped up from the table and ran to find Tony. He entered one of the lower training rooms panting and gasping as he spotted his mentor watching a sparring session between Steve and Barnes.

" _MR. STARK!"_

All sets of eyes turned to the boy that was sprinting at them. "Whoa kiddo, where's the fire?"

He merely shoved his phone into Tony's hands and he read the message.

" _Much love from your aunt and possibly new uncle."_ The picture attached was of May kissing Wade Wilson's cheek.

Barnes stifled a laugh, Steve raised a brow, and Tony let out a long whistle. "Gotta say, must be some sort of man to be able to get that from Aunt Hottie."

With those words, Peter promptly passed out.

 **Weeeeeee and there we have it.**

 **Before anyone asks, no this wasn't an ending segway towards a sequel, just supposed to be a funny little tidbit at the end. I mean it could be but I don't think it's gonna happen. AND the only reason Wade wanted his phone back was because it had Peter's number in it from when he took Ned's phone and he texts Peter all the time, much tot he boy's annoyment  
**

 **I hope I did all right with everyone's characters. First multichapter Marvel story attempt so I hope it turned out nicely. Coulda been two separate chapters but meh.  
**

 **Please point out any spelling or grammatical errors I missed so I might fix them in the future. Leave a review! Come on, it's the end of the story now. I think that warrants at least something. Writers crave feedback!**

 **Hope you enjoyed! See ya in the next one!**


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